The doctor told me she had seen patients like me in that past and that, I was probably never going to get better. I was 13 at the time and quite frankly I was terrified, I've always been ambitious from a young age and thinking that I was never going to be able accomplish my dreams was scary. To be honest that still what scares me the most is that I'll never be able to do what I want to do and be who I want to be. I used to tell myself that one day I was magically going to get better and I'd be normal again and it never happened. I missed basically all of high school and I'm still really sad about it. I feel like I've lost so much. I'm 18 now and I've applied to and gotten into some pretty good schools (it was a last minute decision I had given up hope but I realized I wanted to go more than anything), I'm going no matter what. I've decided that. If I'm still unwell it doesn't matter at least I'll be living my life. Sorry, that got kind of more intense than I meant it to, it just kind of came pouring out.