Just this past August I was referred to an orthopedic surgeon for an evaluation of my CT scan and MRI. The purpose of the visit was to obtain a second opinion as to the cause of my ongoing back and leg pain.
After a brief series of questions regarding the nature of my symptoms, the doctor pulled up my MRI. After a quick glance, he confidently asserted that the culprit for my pain was almost certainly disc herniation and degeneration at L4-L5. I found this hard to believe in light of the following:
Perhaps the most sickening part of the entire ordeal was the casual, breezy manner with which he informed me of all this. Even though his diagnosis made no sense, I felt after awhile that he must be right. He seemed so confident, and is a doctor after all. I left the consultation feeling more hopeless than I’ve ever been in my entire life. I would never have a life without pain. I moved through the remainder of the day in a haze of shock, despair, panic and terrible physical pain.
Even in light of the progress I’ve made, I still keep that experience in the back of my mind. In my darkest moments, I still wonder if he might have been right. Whenever this happens, I attempt to remind myself that fear is often irrational and that there is no reason to put much stock in his diagnosis. After all, what surgeon WOULDN'T recommend surgery?
After a brief series of questions regarding the nature of my symptoms, the doctor pulled up my MRI. After a quick glance, he confidently asserted that the culprit for my pain was almost certainly disc herniation and degeneration at L4-L5. I found this hard to believe in light of the following:
- No pain elicited from bending at the waist, twisting or lifting
- No relief obtained from receiving a cortisone shot directly into the supposedly affected nerve bundle
- No pain in my lower back - instead the pain is focused in my right knee/foot and my upper back/shoulder
Perhaps the most sickening part of the entire ordeal was the casual, breezy manner with which he informed me of all this. Even though his diagnosis made no sense, I felt after awhile that he must be right. He seemed so confident, and is a doctor after all. I left the consultation feeling more hopeless than I’ve ever been in my entire life. I would never have a life without pain. I moved through the remainder of the day in a haze of shock, despair, panic and terrible physical pain.
Even in light of the progress I’ve made, I still keep that experience in the back of my mind. In my darkest moments, I still wonder if he might have been right. Whenever this happens, I attempt to remind myself that fear is often irrational and that there is no reason to put much stock in his diagnosis. After all, what surgeon WOULDN'T recommend surgery?
