day 4/ mot disheartening thing a doctor has told me

A doctor once told me that he had patients who cannot have sex at all, that their body would go into spasm and that some patients never got better. He told me the pain was something I could very well have for the rest of my life. that was really hard to hear because not only did at the time this pain take a lot of joy out of every day activities yoga, watching tv, sex etc. but now there is a chance I could never get better? Never enjoy sex again or maybe never have it. Of course my mind went a million places... how will I live my life this way? who will want to date me? how can I be happy with all of this? All of that kinda stuff. But that was not the most disheartening thing. The most disheartening thing was that I thought I had to deal with all these horrible things and all I wanted to know to know was why do I deserve this... what even causes vulvodynia? But every time I asked a doctor what causes vulvodynia? they would all give me the same disheartening reply "we don't know"

Needless to say I am so glad I found this approach and the TMS community.

 

I go to support group meetings for vulvodynia..well I used to in 2013 when I first got it ...and while some members did have it for a lot of time, most improved or were cured and told us so ....hence they stopped coming to meetings. I think your doctor is an idiot, sorry to say it out loud, but if he clearly has no understanding of what it is or what causes it how can he be so certain you'll have it for life? Most people do NOT come back on forums to say they have been cured, you may see one poster who says they are suffering and then they stop posting ....
I had remission from it for 3 years and a relapse now after severe anxiety (hmm...well no wonder) ...I am certain it will go away again, and I refuse to believe it won't. We need to re-wire our brains to believe that if our pain has no real explanation it must be like a "shortcircuit" in the brain or like an "error" .... I often tell myself before bedtime that there is nothing wrong with me and it will go away... over the past 5 years I have had : lower back pain, coccyx pain really bad, IBS, gastritis ..you name it ...PCOS, acne..all started when the stressful uni I'm in began ....it must be stress!! and TMS

 

Many doctors study to give prescriptions and to make lots of money. They are visited constantly by pharma, during their study and afterward. The main problem with doctors is that when they do not know how to heal an ache or where the problem comes from they tell you right away that you can never heal it. That's what they see every day and they do not bother to research or look for another approach. There are other doctors that could help, but they are very expensive, so this is a good approach to healing. Do not pay attention to any doctors that tell you nonsense like this did, don't ever visit them again, change to another one. That is what I do when I meet one that tells me that I can never heal.

 

Hi, Kylen. Sarah and Leonor have given you excellent advice. I think you will benefit from a daily reading of Dr. Sarno's 12 Daily Reminders. I especially like this extended version:

Herbie Douglas's Extended Version of Sarno's 12 DAILY REMINDERS

1) The pain is due to TMS. This is real pain or anxiety but its caused by subconscious tensions and triggers, stressors and traits to your reactions and fears and also when at boiling point your conscious tension can and does cause real pain too.

2) The main reason for the pain is mild oxygen deprivation. This means that when you are in pain then the the blood is restricted from going to your lower back for instance. The blood being restricted causes oxygen deprivation which causes the pain - remember, where theirs no oxygen then there is pain in the body. Also, The pain stays because of fear and focus to physical organic symptoms and repressions.

3) TMS is a harmless condition caused by my REPRESSED EMOTIONS so even though you think you can harm yourself from the years of pain you have felt and how you feel in general -- so far no reports have been heard from tms healing knowledge causing damage to anyone, it only helps.

4) The principle emotion is your repressed ANGER -- this means under your consciousness lies something that happens automatically to everyone. TMSers have repressions that are stored because of our personality traits, traumas, stressors, fears, strain, etc... When these stored repressions build and build then eventually they cause the brain to send pain into your body to keep you from having an emotional crises. The mind-body thinks its helping you.

5) TMS exists to DISTRACT your attentions from the emotions, stressors, tensions and strains of your personality traits because if you can get distraction then you wont have to be in emotional turmoil. When you don't face and feel your emotions and they get repressed cause you didn't want to deal with something -- they are just adding up in this beaker, ready to pour over and create real pain and anxiety in your body.

6) Since my body is perfectly normal, there is nothing to fear. So in reality when I fear the pain or anxiety I just cause myself undo strain and tension adding to the beaker of pain. If I fear then I feed the pain, If I fear Its impossible to recondition. Fear keeps the pain and anxiety alive in the body through focus.

7) Therefore, physical activity is harmless. If I want to work against the pain I can but its better to lose some of the pain through losing your focus on the body and not fearing the pain. I can start my life over, I don't have to be in pain trying to heal cause I can face the repressions through awareness and journaling.

8) I am resuming all normal physical activity. I don't fear moving anymore. I believe in my bodies ability to heal now. I can move how I want and my patience in flow will be my power. I will not fear moving anymore. I will also practice going out and acting normal again, not in fear of what pain might do to me.

9) The pain is unimportant and powerless. Its only power is how it's hidden -- it's illusion, It's fear.

10) I will keep my attention on the emotional issues. I will think about my emotions and feel my emotions throughout the day. I will not judge, criticize or fear my emotions. I will not run from my emotional issues but face everyone of them. I will feel my emotions fully and cry if I need to. Then I will release the emotion and get my mind and thoughts back to my life and living in the present, in flow.

11) I am in control of all of this. This is how I recover.

I will be thinking PSYCHOLOGICALLY AT ALL TIMES. This means I will keep my thoughts on psychological issues like happiness, fear and anger -- traits and triggers, conditioning and journaling. The science behind mind-body/TMS healing, etc.... This way I will not feed my thoughts to the body -- that is a trick of TMS.

12) TMS will always try to get me to focus on the body caused by the pain until I break its show and flair. When I get my attention off physical symptoms and on emotional issues and psychological issues then I will not feed the fear of the physical issues anymore thus making the TMS of no effect. This will, in return, give us the cure.