Hi I am back at trying this again. I could not believe 100% before. I really think I have this but still can't seem to convince myself 100%. Of course I am kind of beating myself up but made it past hopeless yesterday to trying this today. I've been so obsessed with my physical symptoms since 2004. Trying to think psychologically but during bad flares it feels impossible. I didn't post much or finish the SEP before so I am going to complete it this go around. I am doing gyrotonic tomorrow with my old teacher who moved back to South Carolina from Cali. I haven't seen her in over 2 years. Would normally be very excited but now I'm scared because 1) there is focus on posture and I have hope she will be helpful as she was in the past 2) the flare has been so intense I'm scared it will be worse. 3) I feel obligated to go because she recently moved back AND I haven't met her new baby yet but it takes 50 minutes to get there which turns into my whole afternoon. And wow I feel guilty for being whiny and also embarrassed that I haven't overcome pain. Guess that would be goodist coming out!! Thanks for "listening"