Margot!!
Well known member
How does your personality increase or decrease stress in your life currently?
Like most of us, I am a people pleaser, an over achiever, a perfectionist and a recovering control freak. During my TMS/MBS journey, I have had to look at some diffcult patterns and my tendency to avoid conflict and appease other at my expense. I'm still learning how to get my needs met, asking for what I need is really scary. Ive started to ask for what I need more often, I've started to allow things to be "good enough" without obsessing about the outcome. I am also not responsible for the wellbeing of other grown adults, this is something I thought was mine to carry for a long time. Mostly because I grew up taking care of everyone around me. I learned that caretaking others keeps me safe ( childlike view). As I continue to enforce boundaries, ask for what I need and relax into letting others take care of themselves I am finding more peace and less pain. When I ignore my own needs, relax my boundaries or let perfectionism run away with me, the pain increases. This is HARD WORK, I have had these patterns my whole life and the little girl inside of me is terrified to draw a boundary or have needs and putting myself aside was a regular thing. Everytime, I have to muster up courage to do these things, it can be exhausting. AND I know as time goes on this will get easier.
How are your professional relationships right now? Has the program had any affect on your career?
I have been blessed to have a career I love and many amazing coworkers. I create and facilitate trainings for mental health professionals and the community. I have been working with a colleague and stepping through a 12 week cognitive behavioral therapy program for chronic pain (CBT-CP). I have been talking to my coworker (who lives with chronic pain) about the SEP program. I've shared the education I have gained from books, articles, youtube videos and research I have found as a result of this forum. We are starting to incorporate some of these education principles into a training on how to work with someone who lives with chronic pain for clinician's. Clinicians/therapists need to be educated on pain and the connection to your emotions,repressed emotions, personailty type and the relationship to the past. We know the body keeps the score, but no one told us what to do about it!
In my career I have used my own experiences to get curious and learn. Dr VanderKolk calls this MEsearch. This healing journey is no different. I'm healing and I want to help others find some relief as well.
I just got my copy of "unlearn your pain" and I'm excited to continue with my MEsearch and see what else we can incorprate into the training. I have only been with this agency since April, so I'm still playing it safe as no one has heard of neuroplastic pain, Mindbody syndrome or TMS. I'm hoping at some point there will be an opportunity for me to talk more about neuroplastic pain and Mindbody syndrome and see what will come of it. My coworker and I have discussed doing a group therapy model to directly help those living with chronic pain based on our own experiences living with chronic pain.
Education will be a large part of the group as I know its crucial in the process. I am so grateful for the knowledge I have gained and the research that is on going on this topic. I am so thankful for this forum and all of the support and education I have recieved here. I'm really excited by the possibilities and I am forever honored that I have been called to do this work. Life has improved and expanded. I still have pain sometimes, but I know what to do about it now.
Like most of us, I am a people pleaser, an over achiever, a perfectionist and a recovering control freak. During my TMS/MBS journey, I have had to look at some diffcult patterns and my tendency to avoid conflict and appease other at my expense. I'm still learning how to get my needs met, asking for what I need is really scary. Ive started to ask for what I need more often, I've started to allow things to be "good enough" without obsessing about the outcome. I am also not responsible for the wellbeing of other grown adults, this is something I thought was mine to carry for a long time. Mostly because I grew up taking care of everyone around me. I learned that caretaking others keeps me safe ( childlike view). As I continue to enforce boundaries, ask for what I need and relax into letting others take care of themselves I am finding more peace and less pain. When I ignore my own needs, relax my boundaries or let perfectionism run away with me, the pain increases. This is HARD WORK, I have had these patterns my whole life and the little girl inside of me is terrified to draw a boundary or have needs and putting myself aside was a regular thing. Everytime, I have to muster up courage to do these things, it can be exhausting. AND I know as time goes on this will get easier.
How are your professional relationships right now? Has the program had any affect on your career?
I have been blessed to have a career I love and many amazing coworkers. I create and facilitate trainings for mental health professionals and the community. I have been working with a colleague and stepping through a 12 week cognitive behavioral therapy program for chronic pain (CBT-CP). I have been talking to my coworker (who lives with chronic pain) about the SEP program. I've shared the education I have gained from books, articles, youtube videos and research I have found as a result of this forum. We are starting to incorporate some of these education principles into a training on how to work with someone who lives with chronic pain for clinician's. Clinicians/therapists need to be educated on pain and the connection to your emotions,repressed emotions, personailty type and the relationship to the past. We know the body keeps the score, but no one told us what to do about it!
In my career I have used my own experiences to get curious and learn. Dr VanderKolk calls this MEsearch. This healing journey is no different. I'm healing and I want to help others find some relief as well.
I just got my copy of "unlearn your pain" and I'm excited to continue with my MEsearch and see what else we can incorprate into the training. I have only been with this agency since April, so I'm still playing it safe as no one has heard of neuroplastic pain, Mindbody syndrome or TMS. I'm hoping at some point there will be an opportunity for me to talk more about neuroplastic pain and Mindbody syndrome and see what will come of it. My coworker and I have discussed doing a group therapy model to directly help those living with chronic pain based on our own experiences living with chronic pain.
Education will be a large part of the group as I know its crucial in the process. I am so grateful for the knowledge I have gained and the research that is on going on this topic. I am so thankful for this forum and all of the support and education I have recieved here. I'm really excited by the possibilities and I am forever honored that I have been called to do this work. Life has improved and expanded. I still have pain sometimes, but I know what to do about it now.