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Day 31, me and my professional relationships

C

Calum

Well known member
I find that thanks to this program I am starting to worry less about what my peers think of me, I used to worry a lot about being popular at work and hanging out with people at the weekend and after work for beers etc. but I'm starting to care less and less, I still go out and have a laught with my work friends, but I'm starting to worry less about what they think and trying to be th emost dominate one in the group. Its OK if I'm not the most dominate, it was only my insecurities that were making me try to act that way anyway, that is not who I truely am.

My relationship with my manager still needs abit of work. He is not a geologist and I really resent it when he disagrees with one of my hypotheses when he has not geological experience what so ever. I think my feelings of anger towards him are exacerbated by me not getting along with authority figures in general which stems from my feelings of anger and resentment towards by dad for being a controlling authoritarian whilst I was growing up. But at least I can recognise these issues now, before I would just feel resentful towards my manager and think it was all his fault!
 
Congrats, Calum. It's not worth it to try to be the most popular or well-liked person among your professional or personal relationships.
I used to think I had to be funny when talking with friends, but a close friend told me not to, that I should just be myself and that I was likeable as I was.

You've made a huge discovery in knowing that your feelings of anger about your manager at work stem from feelings of anger
and resentment about your father since he was a controlling authoritarian. The feelings about your manager may well have triggered
your earlier feelings about your father... a perfect set-up for TMS pain. But now you know it, the SEP will work great for you.
 
Hi Walt, thanks for your reply. It does feel like a weight off my shoulders not trying to be the most popular, outspoken, leader of my peers, but I do occasionally see myself reverting to that behaviour and have to gently remind myself that it does not matter what my peers think, and I do not have to be the leader or the big man, I'm fine as I am. Sorry what does SEP mean?
 
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