Events with strong emotions #1 I grew up with an angry emotionally unattached dad. I remember always feeling like I needed to be tough, act a certain way, be perfect, work hard, i felt like an inconvenience, I was never good enough, etc. I was so hungry for his approval and love. I realize now that my inner bully is his voice. Constantly self hatred and hard on myself. I know that my eating disorder stemmed from all of this self pressure/anxiety. I remember one of my first emotional life events was anytime we (my siblings and I) were running around the house having fun he'd look at us with disdain and tell us to be quiet. Like he was discusted with us and we didn't deserve to have fun. I remember a time in college when my first apartment got broken into and robbed and I was terrified. I called my Dad and he said "things are going to happen and you need to learn to deal with them". I was so hurt. I remember never feeling safe (especially emotionally) and always having to fend for myself and take care of myself. I didn't trust anyone to take care of me and still don't.