AMEN Today I was asked whats my fav part of the program and honestly their are days I love all of it and days I dont. I like the educational part at the start but feel the writing has helped me identify a lot of things in me.But I want to talk about what we with tms are dealing with day in and day out "Pain, anxiety, depression, and all the associated ailments " . I have been in the middle of a bad spell and felt just beat up but today while I was trying to walk as I was so stiff and immobile and in cruel pain. I got up and told him out of the blue I WAS going out for a walk with him and the dogs and that I was in charge and I was not a victim ,so off I went . Yes I struggled ,compared to my normal walking it was appalling I am luck I live in the country so nobody walks its so rural. My husband was behind me and when I said I felt like I was walking like Frankenstein he laughed and said yep but to focus on the fact I was out doing it, I struggled on , sweating and having a hard time but I did 30 minutes talking to myself explaining it was not a concern but a show that the mind was trying hard to shut my new TMS program and way of thinking and allowing emotions in down. The big thing for me was when we got home My husband and I sat down (I lay) to watch a movie and out of nowhere he said " Noiren I think your brave and can do anything and any challenge you want then he said "you know GOD ONLY GIVES HIS TOUGHEST BATTLES TO HIS STRONGEST SOLDIERS" now that got me , I am a catholic that has huge faith and regardless of religion this is a statement that rings true. He had read it or something like it ages ago and felt it was the time to say it. You know guys we are the toughest soliders, I defy anyone to go through what each and every one of us goes through personally big challenges and small and to keep going and to keep getting up when we are knocked down and not be the strongest any of us could ever be. So I am strong and I am up for this no matter what it throws at me. This may be harder in the short to medium term to take up the dedication to get to the bottom of this to face your fears and emotions to go to the dark yuckey places in yourself . But in the long term we get back a life Our Life the real one not a dampened , smaller constricted pained life, with our confidence and happiness compromised on a day to day basis.Thsi grey tired that we have lived with for so long that we push so hard to be seen as normal when behind that smile as pain and a worn out body.I deserve my Life back and its mine to take and I just need to find out whats making the pain stay work the program and learn ....if my mind could bring all this suffering Sarno tells us the mind can take it all away...lesson learned move on. So Good luck to us all and a pat on the shoulder would not go a misss we are too hard on ourselves and this battle (with the mind)deserves some compassion and love God knows we deserve it.