• Alan has completed the new Pain Recovery Program. To read or share it, use this updated link: https://www.tmswiki.org/forum/painrecovery/
  • Welcome to the new TMS Wiki server! Things aren't finished yet: email is not set up, so notification and password-reset emails don't go out, and new registrations are paused until email is installed. Details and updates are in this thread (click here). Locked out? Email tmswikisignups@gmail.com from the address where you receive TMS Wiki notifications.

Day 14-Crisi

F

Francesca

Peer Supporter
Today is day 14 and I’m having a crisis: I have lower back pain, and I’m linking it to the effort I made yesterday when I lifted something heavy. I’m trying to think about something that might have caused me emotional discomfort between yesterday and today, but it’s not really working.

But what do you think—how can one tell if pain is from a TMS episode? I mean, not everything will be TMS from now on… I’m confused about this concept.

Overwhelmed by the pain, I went out and walked 6 km, but it was painful at times, and now the pain in my lower back is quite strong.

Any advice?
Thanks in advance
 
Why is my brain trying to distract me? Or did I actually injure myself?
How can I rule out a physical cause?
 
Francesca said:
I’m trying to think about something that might have caused me emotional discomfort between yesterday and today,
Click to expand...
No, doing this is not going to be helpful to you at all, because it is not that precise or logical.

This is why we use pen and paper. The purpose of the writing exercises is to quickly write down ANYTHING that is on your mind, no matter how random it might be, and no matter when it occurred in real life, and especially if you think that you can skip something as "not important". The faster you scribble down your thoughts, the better, so that you don't have time to edit or "fix" them.

The things you need to uncover and examine are the thoughts that your brain felt that it needs to repress (and replace with pain) and yes, it apparently found a new reason to do this sometime between yesterday and today. HOWEVER, the actual incident or interaction could be something which happened last week, last month, or a long time ago - which was recently triggered into memory, perhaps in the last week or so for some reason (sometimes by something we read or see or hear, or a personal interaction).

It IS random, which I understand is terrifying for you, as you have acknowledged that you have an extreme attachment to perfectionism (one might say obsessively so).

You are terrified that things might be out of your control - which is logically irrational. If you will stop being so terrified and apply your logic, you might be able to accept the truth that you are perfectly safe, and that uncertainty and imperfection are not going to physically hurt you.


Francesca said:
How can I rule out a physical cause?
Click to expand...
If the doctors have already said that they can't explain your pain, it is quite illogical to think that something could suddenly now be responsible. If you want to go back for another examination, that is your choice, but it will more likely be a waste of time and energy that would be better spent by reducing your anxiety and perfectionism! There are many Success Stories here where other people describe the futility of their multiple doctor visits because they were so afraid of "injuries" that did not exist. When they properly reduced their anxiety and addressed their repressed emotions with courage and acceptance, they stopped looking for physical "causes" and they recovered.
 
How do I reduce anxiety and perfectionism? It says in the book that I don't have to change myself but that to heal simply accepting that I have them is enough. Is that right?
 
Francesca said:
How do I reduce anxiety and perfectionism? It says in the book that I don't have to change myself but that to heal simply accepting that I have them is enough. Is that right?
Click to expand...
No, personally I don't think that is a useful interpretation.

I'll address anxiety first. Anxiety is not a personality trait. It is the exact opposite of Acceptance. Anxiety is useful when there might be an actual threat close at hand, but most of us don't live with actual threats in our lives. At its worst, what I call EIU anxiety can be a very disabling impediment to living a normal life. In order to recover from TMS, anxiety must be addressed, otherwise it gets in the way of doing the deeper emotional work. EIU stands for Excessive, Irrational, and Unnecessary.

I feel like someone must have recommended this little book before now, because it is so essential to so many of us. It is Hope and Help for Your Nerves, by Claire Weekes, and I'm sure it's been translated into many languages, including Italian (@feduccini?).

This may be the book you need to read and study on your vacation, before you go any farther with the SEP.
 
Last edited:
Perfectionism is described as a personality trait by Dr Sarno, but he's also quite clear that it is a trait which can be unhealthy when it is excessive and gets in the way of living your best life. Just like anxiety, Perfectionism becomes dysfunctional if it is Excessive, Irrational, and Unnecessary.

Ultimately, @Francesca, you have a choice. If your life is working for you, you don't need to change a thing. This, of course, is what your TMS brain is trying to tell you, and you are free to continue listening to it. But if you are not satisfied with your current life, something has got to change! After all, if humans never made the choice to change, we would never have taken risks, or learned anything new, or ever had new experiences, and we would still be living in caves.

Don't let your primitive and fearful TMS brain keep you stuck by focusing on meaningless word games.
 
JanAtheCPA said:
Hope and Help for Your Nerves, by Claire Weekes, and I'm sure it's been translated into many languages, including Italian (@feduccini?).
Click to expand...
oh I'm brazilian hahaha (I do have italian citizenship though).

Just searched Amazon.it and couldn't find Hope and Help in Italian unfortunately.
 
@Francesca
Claire Weekes wrote a bunch of books on anxiety. They all have similar messages. I did a search. Her book, Self Help for Your Nerves, is published in eight languages. I couldn’t find if there is an Italian one, but maybe you can. She is such a great help! I hope you can find a book by her.
 
Last edited:
In case it is helpful at all, subtitles in different languages could be selected for the audiobook that seems to be on youtube:
>
Select CC > From settings choose autotranslate to your language.
The translation might not be great as autotranslate can sometimes struggle, but in case it opens up something for you that is helpful if you're able to access the link in your region?
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top