Well I guess I need a break from this because I feel very reactive. All I need is that Holmes And Rahe stress scale and add points up to be further worried about a risk of illness. Just one event in my life gets me a third of the way there. I have read ad nauseum about how our thoughts affect our bodies and I have tried to find what traumas there were in my childhood and I have searched these things for years but feel unsuccessful and then there's the catch 22 situation that you need to search out what's wrong but then you need to think positively.And though I'm quite sure my brain is sending the pain, I am not a perfectionist nor do I overly care what people think, etc. I am though a striver and I am sure I must have repressed anger as I child when I tried to be good.....but who hasn't. It works to say okay, I don't care about the pain for a while and that does work for a time, but then there comes a time when it is just too much. Yours in frustration.