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Day 1

S

Sage

Newcomer
I am reeling from having an unnecessary hysterectomy 9 days ago. I googled psychosomatic pain and started reading. I really believe my diagnosis is tms and feel so bad I didn't figure this out before having major surgery. My depression and anxiety is difficult as I try to recover. I am putting a lot of pressure on myself for having made such a serious mistake, the regret is devastating.
 
Just stop right now! The operation is done. Whether it was medically required or not - it is done. Do not beat yourself up for having it. That is a TMS trait -but you need to overcome it. Be kind to yourself! The reason you had the op was to try and make things better - so you made a decision to try and improve things. That is good! Keep with the impulse of wanting to make things better. If you think you have TMS (and I really believe most people do to some extent) then investigate. Do the Structured Educational Programme, read Sarno's books, and any others that 'speak' to you. Take time in your day to concentrate on you - meditate, practice mindfulness, get out into nature. The point is to become a whole and balanced person, not to beat yourself up for past mistakes. Really the moe mistakes the better - if we see them as mistakes, we try not to do it again - we learn from it, we learn and we grow!
If a child falls off a bicycle trying to learn to ride - we don't beat them for falling off - we encourage them to try again...
I had TMS for 22 years, masquerading as fibromyalgia. I missed my chance to have children because I was too ill to be able to look after them. Part of me is sad that I do not have children but part of me celebrates my freedom. It is all in the perception.
So embrace your inner child, be kind to yourself, let your body heal from the op, treat yourself to quiet moments and peacefulness. Tis all grist for the mill... Put all that pressure on yourself to heal, physically, emotionally and psychologically. Be kind to you...
 
hecate105 said:
Just stop right now! The operation is done. Whether it was medically required or not - it is done. Do not beat yourself up for having it. That is a TMS trait -but you need to overcome it. Be kind to yourself! The reason you had the op was to try and make things better - so you made a decision to try and improve things. That is good! Keep with the impulse of wanting to make things better. If you think you have TMS (and I really believe most people do to some extent) then investigate. Do the Structured Educational Programme, read Sarno's books, and any others that 'speak' to you. Take time in your day to concentrate on you - meditate, practice mindfulness, get out into nature. The point is to become a whole and balanced person, not to beat yourself up for past mistakes. Really the moe mistakes the better - if we see them as mistakes, we try not to do it again - we learn from it, we learn and we grow!
If a child falls off a bicycle trying to learn to ride - we don't beat them for falling off - we encourage them to try again...
I had TMS for 22 years, masquerading as fibromyalgia. I missed my chance to have children because I was too ill to be able to look after them. Part of me is sad that I do not have children but part of me celebrates my freedom. It is all in the perception.
So embrace your inner child, be kind to yourself, let your body heal from the op, treat yourself to quiet moments and peacefulness. Tis all grist for the mill... Put all that pressure on yourself to heal, physically, emotionally and psychologically. Be kind to you...
Click to expand...
Thank you for taking the time to respond. I will do my best to move forward.
 
Hi, Sage. Hecates's reply to you is the best I or anyone could give you.
Doctors make mistakes, some recommend surgery unnecessarily. I just read that a cancer surgeon has been sentenced to 25 years or more in jail for giving hundreds of patients chemotherapy when they didn't have cancer. Imagine the anger they have toward that doctor! I knew a woman who said her husband, the head cancer surgeon of a leading hospital in the Chicago area, told her he gave cancer patients procedures costing $500 that they didn't need. That was 20 years ago so the $500 meant a lot more then.

Just put the unneeded operation behind you and believe your pain is from TMS and work in the Structured Education Program. The unnecessary operation most likely has left you with anger, which causes TMS pain, but you may have other repressed emotions causing pain.

Maybe even try laughing, telling yourself you are only human and like most of us, have been given some very bad advice from doctors.

Another top cancer surgeon wanted to cut open my neck because he believed a tiny pimple on my neck was cancerous. I insisted on a culture be taken first, and he strongly resisted that. Finally he agreed and it turned out that the culture revealed only a tiny water blister that went away by itself.

So you are not alone in having followed a doctor's recommendation to have surgery. Put it behind you.
 
Don't worry Sage, you're here now, that is literally ALL THAT MATTERS. You can live from this moment forward and enjoy your life. For me the journaling has tapped into a lot of rage and anger, much of which is directed at the medical establishment. I feel more and more free every time I'm able to tap into that rage, look at it, experience it, accept, and let it go. It's an amazing and beautiful experience. We are so fortunate to be here now, dealing with our TMS now.
 
I agree. The TMSWiki is a wonderful place to be, to learn and heal from TMS and to help others.

Accept the pain and why we got it, then move on to live in the present moment.
 
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