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Day 1

futuredancer

futuredancer

Peer Supporter
All odds are in favor of the TMS diagnosis. Still, from an emotional perspective, I fear for my health and feel that my body is not strong. For the last 15 years, I have had episodes of alopecia, insomnia, urinary problems, fever, back pain, to mention a few symptons. And my psychological profile matches Sarno`s description of a TMSer. Since last January I started feeling back pain again. Even though I am aware it is part of the TMS strategy, I can`t help but being afraid of hurting myself due to a hearniated disc diagnosed, even though it is not a severe case.
 
Futuredancer,
Sometime a good way to combat these fears is to read a lot of testimonies because you will find others who had so much fear and could not
do anything. Then as they were consistent they gradually got completely healed. That is inspirational.

When I was combating with fear, I started devouring the TMS books and read people's success stories. I also stopped babying myself. NO MORE
HOT WATER BOTTLES, NO MORE BENGAY... This really made a huge difference.

Also, I started imagining myself wrestling with my symptoms and I would always win. I would imagine myself standing very tall with no symptoms.
I did it over and over again, particularly before I went to bed and when I woke up. I also imagined the activity I wanted to do like walking with
out any pain. Believe it or not these imagery tools really worked.

Journaling is also a good tool to investigate if there is anything underlying that is not on a conscious level.
Just keep digging.

One thing to remember out bodies are a lot stonger than we think. And out minds are very powerful. Sometimes we have to get out
thoughts and the words we speak lined up to send a very authoritative message to out subconscious telling it who is boss.

I hope this helps. These are the things that worked for me. You will find the strategy that will work for you.
Be encouraged, you at the right place here on TMS wiki.
Don't hestitate to write any of your questions or even frustrations.
G.R.
 
Thank you, G.R, for taking the time to share with me your experience. I will keep digging for the emotional roots of the pain and let go the vision of a weak body. It might have served me in my childhood years but now it is on the way of what I want to become. Thanks again.
 
Yes, futuredancer, I agree with G.R.: Start reading and listening to the success stories in the Media section of this forum. Gives you a positive perspective when you see that other people have licked TMS. Of course, journaling too, and I always direct people to the SEP, which you seem to have started. Just remember that your body is not intrinsically weak or broken. All the best.
 
Today, after reading the material for Day 3, I was for about one hour without any pain. After that, TMS launched another attack. Still working on thinking psychological.
Question to ponder - Day 3: Last time I did any workout was swimming this mid January, but I was already in pain, and it hurt really bad. When I left the pool, I was really concerned about the condition of my spine. I limped back home and felt a lot of frustration. The last time I did a really good and intense workout was in September 2011, when my back went out for the first time.
 
One hour pain free already on day 3?!?!?!? That is INCREDIBLE progress!! I know it's hard, but try really hard to maintain your focus on that one hour and extending it to be a permanent condition! I know all too well how discouraging a repeat attack can be, but there is a positive side to it. The pain went away for an entire hour - if it had a structural cause it's very unlikely that it would have done that, which means that it can and will go away again! My experience is that the more you focus on the positives, the easier it becomes, and the longer the pain stays away. It's very helpful for me to have "positive thought" partners, people I can call on to put a positive thought in my head and help me reframe my focus when I can't do it alone. I also highly recommend positive "what if" thoughts - they're working wonders for me.
 
Thanks for the encouragement, Leslie. This one hour pain-free was really convenient to confirm the diagnosis. What do you mean by positive what if thoughts? Can you give me an example? :)
 
Dr Marc Sopher maybe jujune and suitable for a young adult audience, but one point he does make in his book To Be or Not to Be Pain Free: The Mindbody Syndrome does seem applicable to your one-hour opening in TMS pain: Every time you experience a pain-free window, it's very important to celebrate. That sends a positive message to your unconscious mind and helps with deprogramming TMS. Such a break also lets you know that your condition is not really physical or structural since this would certainly not be the case with an autoimmune disorder. Friday last week I took a 3-mile hike over a course where I had always hurt before and was very pleasantly surprised that I was getting better. Then, a couple of nights ago I took another hike over a different course and felt even more flexible and pain-free. Success builds on success!
 
Day 16... I wish I could again repeat the 1 hour pain free I had on Day 3. I ve been struggling with that voice in the back of my head that says I have something physical. I know that it is TMS but at the same time I feel stuck in the stage I am now. With all the journaling, religiously done everyday, I suceeded in identifying a lot of emotional garbage I had buried. Still, the pain is as well buried in my left hip. I will keep reading and doing the program. Hopefully a breakthrough will come.
 
I ve been struggling with that voice in the back of my head that says I have something physical.
Click to expand...

This is the point where intellectual acceptance of the diagnosis just isn't enough. You may believe the pain is TMS, but you still have those doubts. Just takes a long while to process and accept it at a deeper level. Right now I still can "feel" where my TMS pain is in my sciatic nerve on the left side; however, it no longer hurts me in a physical sense. Somehow I've managed to detach myself from the underlying psychological process that made the pain necessary. I don't know how to put it exactly but I'm no longer obsessing with the physical symptoms. They don't have a hold on me anymore. Check out some of the posts by Dr James Alexander on this site. He gets into this a whole lot more, as does Eric Watson. The both can supply a lot of valuable insights.
 
Thanks, Bruce. I will keep working to take the acceptance to a deeper level. I still feel my pain pretty physical so the psychological process is still running the show, but eventually I will fire the "little bastard" :)
 
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