day 1 forearm pain

I started out having wrist and forearm pain about two months ago. I work as a massage therapist so I'm giving this TMS thing a shot. I'm not a stranger to psychosomatic pain. Im currently 34, in my mid 20's I struggled with shoulder, ankle and wrist pain that the Dr.s could not diagnose. I also had a chronic sore throat for two years that could not be diagnosed. I've also struggled with overeating most of my life.
Growing up, my parents never talked about anything. There was a lot of tension in the house, nothing abusive, but definitely non-communicative and not very loving. So I learned to stuff everything.
With my previous history, I'm totally open to the TMS diagnosis. I went to the Dr. for my forearm pain 4x's now. The first Dr. called it myofascial pain and the 2nd ordered an mri which i'm waiting for. When I've taken pain killers or have gotten acupuncture, I've noticed the pain can move to other locations and my other arm. When I touch the area I feel the pain, it is not tender. At times it has felt very slightly swollen but other than that it does not feel physical. Just when I move my arm there is pain. I notice the pain also increases with my anxiety level, and I've been able to reason and talk the pain away at times. But for now i'm out of work for 2 months because of the pain and have had my wrist braced. The pain flairs up when I work on people doing massage. My anxiety level about this is high because of the loss of work and money, and just getting started with my career in the healing arts field. I think about it constantly (like my previous bouts of pain in m 20's). It becomes all consuming.
A few months before this started, I graduated from grad school, we bought a house and moved, started a new job, have a preteen stepdaughter who can be a challenge at times , I stopped meditating, doing my self care of meditation and hiking, started overeating again and smoking more weed to help me deal with the pressures of life. Needless to say, I'm pretty open to the TMS diagnosis and am grateful to have found recently found Dr. Sarno and this website through my struggle.

 

Glad you are here! I have forearm, hand and some other upper body issues and have run the gamut of doctors, treatments, diagnoses, etc. I don't have lots of advice right now except to say there are tons of resources on this site. And I'm sure you know this, but a first step might be starting to do your self-care activities again

 

Hi Amarie,
I am glad you found this place, started the SEP, and have such a start on connecting your symptoms to your emotions and stress levels. Good luck in the journey. I think Barb suggestion is a good one. It seems when we most need good self-care (when under more stress) we lose the good habits. Over the years, I have learned to be especially vigilant when under stress: "stick to my programs" of exercise, etc. It starts with just one positive activity that you see as self-care, and then...?
Andy B.

 

Self care is the answer. This morning I goofed up making breakfast and made a big mess on my countertop.
Immediately, my eyes began looking at things not quite right. It has happened before when I am under a lot
of stress or really angry about something. I realized I was angry about making the mess, so I immediately
began laughing and also telling myself it was caused by TMS. My eyes cleared up right away and I was no
longer angry at myself for being such a klutz. I know I am a klutz, so what's to get mad at myself for! haha

 

Thanks everyone. I've noticed the pain is pretty much down to nothing in the last 2 days. Once in a while I notice it, but then I talk it away... "You are just TMS and I'm not going to be afraid of you." Meditating more and trying to be more aware of the underlying thoughts and fears under the pain. And allowing myself to release the fear and anxiety.
I really appreciate you all responding and sharing your stories. Its helpful to have people who are going through this with me. I'm committing to following through with this program, and taking better care of myself.

 

Great Amarie!!
One thing for sure is that you understand the concept of self-care. That is a huge step ahead of many in our society. Then, if you see the need for it, the pleasure in it, and you can ignore the Inner Critic's judgements about how much you are or are not doing, it kind of comes natural!
Andy B.