Convincing a loved one he has TMS

My father's back "goes out on him" a lot; his neck, upper back also. He has other somataform stuff but he believes because he is 67 and more so because he isn't a tense type (and doesnt have much pain on palpation of the tender points Sarno highlights) that it is purely physical. It makes him miserable. He is occupied with it 24/7; getting up to stretch every 15 minutes, he wont watch a movie in the theatre, doesnt travel much (due to excessive sitting, risk of back going out and being stranded in an airport etc) and basically makes his life a real challenge. HIs mind is on taking care of his back all the time.

I've been benefiting a lot with TMS treatment for fibromyalgia/chronic fatigue type symptoms; but he is sure it is not part of what he is dealing with.

So my questions are a couple:

1) anyone have any advice in how to convince someone that TMS could be a part of what they are dealing with?
2) what is a way to do this.
3) his main arguments are that there isnt much pain (mainly back going out) and he isnt a tense kind of person (though I wonder if at a subconscious level he is) ; anyone know of any links for people who have done well with back going out? Seems all the studies from Drs Schecter Schubiner etc are on pain issues with the back.

Thanks

Joseph

 

get them to watch this.
Juliet's son badgered her to read Sarno over and over. It is a familiar tale. Explain to him Sarno's credentials etc and thats all you can do really. Maybe Walt would be a good example given his 'vintage'

 

Joey, if your father doesn't want to watch this 45-minute video, have him at least check out the ABC 20/20 segment on our introductory wiki page:
http://www.tmswiki.org/ppd/The_20/20_segment_on_John_Sarno_and_TMS

Whether someone thinks he/she is "tense" or not is beside the point. Our primitive brains demand that we constantly scan the horizon for danger - which means that we are constantly on the alert - so by nature, we are always poised for fight-or-flight. It's a survival mechanism which has not evolved to meet the new stresses of modern life, and it does not serve us well now that we live well beyond what nature intended. Many of us without childhood trauma nonetheless start to exhibit TMS symptoms later in life, partly due to the number of years that our normal childhood emotions have been repressed, and partly due to the number of years we live with this constant alertness for danger.

You can assess his level of tension by how he reacts to the world - while driving, for example, or dealing with a store clerk, or with technology. And don't forget the classic TMS personality traits of goodism (always doing for others) and perfectionism - it will be obvious if he has those.