Constructive ways of expressing rage

When I was 17 years old, I remember getting some back pain after doing 40 sit ups. It was quite excruciating and every time I did sit ups from that point on I would get some back pain. I didn't really think much of it then but stopped doing sit ups altogether. Every time I tried doing sit ups from the latter half of my senior year in high school onwards, I would get excruciating back pain that would last no less than 15 minutes.

I recently moved from 3 sit ups to 6 sit ups. LOL it makes me sound like a total weakling but the pain is not nearly as bad now as it was before discovering Sarno and the duration of the pain is now counted in a matter of a few minutes rather than what used to potentially be hours. I can do 13 pushups and 8-10 pullups on any given day so why should I settle for never being able to do 40-50 situps in a row in the near future? As the common expression in Mandarin goes: JiaYou! (literally: Add more gasoline [to the vehicle]) which means step on it, keep going!

We can power through TMS one day at a time! We just have to understand how and why we are feeling the pain we feel pain. Otherwise, even a 1000 years of focus will not get us anywhere.

 

Hi Mr Rage

I highly recommend Claire Weekes' book "Hope and Help for your Nerves". This book always settles my anxiety and gets me out of a vicious cycle.

If journaling works for you then continue with this. Be as raw as you can be about your feelings. You are still hurt by your Dad and angry about this. Get angry on paper, but then try to see your Dad as a flawed individual whose arrogance is perhaps hiding his own insecurities. He perhaps didn't have the best father figure in his life and inadvertently has passed this on to his own son. Forgive him for being the way he is. You may never receive the love and appreciation you want from him, and you need to get to a place of accepting that. Be proud of the person you are.

You have mentioned that you are grateful for discovering Dr Sarno. I feel grateful every day for this alone, as otherwise I'd still be lost in a fog of despair. Remind yourself of this gratitude every morning when you rise and evening before bed. Use daily affirmations like "my body is healthy and strong". Say these over and over - in the mirror too! Be confident that having discovered Sarno and this forum you are now - finally - in good hands and healing is happening.

Your pain will go, but it needs time. You've had the gas on high and your pot is still bubbling. Turn off the gas and allow the tension and rage to gently dissipate. Change your name to Mr Calm!

Claire's book will get you back on track, but in the meantime do some searches of her on this forum - there'll be other posts and links about her.

Keep it simple. Soothe your tired nervous system at night for an hour before bed. Listen to Dr Emmett Miller's "easing into sleep" and his other wonderful CD's.

You'll get there. Colly

 

The most difficult activity for me is to meditate in a sitting position. I have a lot of pain when I meditate and I just keep repeating to myself "I am pain free"
I tried to meditate for an hour and half today but could manage only 25 minutes of uninterrupted meditation. It's not really even the pain that makes meditation hard, time just seems to drag on infinitely, especially around the 10-15 minute mark. I just kept repeating in my head "I am pain free" but at some point the phrase loses its meaning and my mind would start to wander... It does seem to bring pain levels down for the rest of the day though. I'll try to do more meditation and see what happens.

 

Personally it sounds like a total drag to me, why are you putting yourself through this? Why don't you do something more fun? It sounds like you are punishing yourself.