Having TMS for 1.5 years forced me to study intensively. I read books on spirituality,psychology,meditation, self help books, tms books, health books, self management book. I had ups and down, yet i grabbed few ideas here and there...and just ran to other book, i was desperate to find solution...today connecting those dots, i feel i didn't follow single books wholeheartedly...however...I have a sort of new paradigm of looking at life and tms, in my mind. Lately, this way of viewing life is lingering on my mind....it is helping me to look at my-SELF.. i am able to look at my own suffering with compassion... I read , "anything that is yours can never be you." so, my-BODY, it is not me. my-BRAIN, it is not me. Who am I? Let's assume, I am variable X(as we do in maths). Based on culture religion place people call X as soul/light or whatever. Since I am science student, it came to my mind I am an energy. A packet of energy. I am a computer science student. Now, analogy of life in my mind is formed like this: I = packet of energy, like electricity through circuits of computer. My brain/mind = software codes of computer called my-SELF My body = hardware of computer Viewing from this perspective, I realize, I and my-SELF are different. I = energy to flow into any direction, my-SELF is software code written in my-BRAIN knowingly unknowingly from different sources in childhood and my-BODY hardware just functions based on codes written in my-SELF. Software codes on my-BRAIN worked on automation.Now, I can see how my-SELF is using ME(energy) to creates state of continuous tension,suffering and my-BODY is expressing them. And I have many forms of tms here and there all over my-BODY coming and going. I am amazed to realize my-SELF is creating misery out of everything. If, that is less, then my-SELF imagines and projects possible misery from past and future into present. I had my core software as : I am not good person. And, I felt it's time to update my software codes (started doing meditation), brush off and clean dust from my hardware (exercise) because my-BODY and my-MIND are ship through which I flow through life, at least I deserve cozy home within! Hope it is helpful.