Chronic rectal pain from painless spasm

I’m new to this Support Forum. I hope someone can give me some helpful advice as I'm desperate for relief from my pain.

About 5 years ago I pushed my clothes dryer a few inches when I felt a < 2-second painless spasm in my abdominal area. Over the following week it evolved into dull left-sided rectal pain along with bi-lateral upper thigh burning sensations. Also, I've periodically been experiencing small fasciculations throughout my body's muscles, though they are not painful. Fortunately, I have no trouble sitting. I had a thorough medical work-up which included MRIs, EMGs, an MRN and numerous other tests all of which were normal. My anxiety, fear and depression have been terrible wondering when/if this miserable pain will ever end, however, I’m losing hope. When I exercise I can sometimes feel a “tugging" sensation in my rectal area whereupon I get bad flare-ups of my pain. One year ago while standing and talking to someone I’d just met I experienced a similar quick spasm in my abdomen which has resulted in chronic right-sided scrotal pain. The pain feels very real in the tissues but I wonder how such minimal “insults” (the two very quick spasms) could have started this cascade of terrible pain.

I’ve recently started working with a TMS therapist, though it hasn’t gone well as I feel stuck between the tissue vs. the mind-body cause of the continuing pain. I welcome any opinions on this issue as the pain feels very much generated from my body. Also, the horrible fear, does anyone have any advice how to lessen or eliminate my fear? I feel as though my fear is holding me back from healing regardless of the cause. I’m in a constant state of anxiety over the very painful symptoms.

My sincerest appreciation to anyone that can help me.

 

The brain creates all sensations. Don't be so impressed or tricked by your particular sensations. They are not special and that's good news. There's nothing wrong with you so at this point you have to decide to get better. Fear is the emotional form of doubt and it won't go down until you counter and eradicate all the doubt, uncertainty and twisted logic. Nothing will keep a person more stuck than straddling the fence between the structural and mind body (aka anxiety). You will have to commit to the belief that this is all brain based and your brain is receiving incorrect info from your own thoughts. Only you can make that decision to get off the fence and decide that there's nothing wrong with you. At this point the situation has become a habit and the only way to reverse a habit is to change your thoughts and stop buying into doubt.

 

miffybunny, thank you very much for your reply. I often read people describe their "aha!" moment when they realized that it must be a mind-body disorder. For some reason I just can't get there. I've made a rule-in/rule-out sheet but it hasn't persuaded me. Again, my pain is so instinctually visceral that I just can't get to to the point where I can believe my mind is actually causing this. Is there anything you know of that helps a person to realize that they indeed have a mind-body disorder and that following that path will resolve their symptoms?

 

Think about it logically....when we are sad, we cry tears, when embarrassed our cheeks get red, afraid our hearts race, sexually aroused...you get the picture.... Do we go to the eye dr. or to the cheek dr.? I could go on and on with the way our emotions and thoughts determine our physiology. It's common sense. The problem you are having is you can't make the leap from those banal examples to the symptoms you are experiencing right now. The truth is they are all the same. If the body has the functionality to do something, the brain can co opt it for it's purposes. The brain is the master controller of every single system and cell in the body. If that doesn't convince you, then there is something emotional going on that is deeper seated. This is pure science. No mystery here. The reason your symptoms have persisted these years is simply because you never changed your thoughts.

 

miffybunny, that's very helpful and makes sense. It also makes sense that when having so many different symptoms it must be one source rather than many different problems - for me that seems to be fear and anxiety driving the pain. When convinced it's a mind-body disorder, what should I change my thoughts to? Also, the big one for me, how do I go about lessening my fear? My fear of the pain has me in its grip.

 

Dr. Sarno gave us 12 wonderful points to focus on. He suggests repeating these daily.

1. The pain is due to TMS, not to a structural abnormality
   
   
2. The direct reason for the pain is mild oxygen deprivation
   
   
3. TMS is a harmless condition caused by my repressed emotions
   
   
4. The principal emotion is my repressed ANGER
   
   
5. TMS exists only to distract my attentions from the emotions
   
   
6. Since my back (replace with whatever pain you’ve got) is basically normal there is nothing to fear
   
   
7. Therefore, physical activity is not dangerous
   
   
8. And I MUST resume all normal physical activity
   
   
9. I will not be concerned or intimidated by the pain
   
   
10. I will shift my attention from pain to the emotional issues
    
    
11. I intend to be in control-NOT my subconscious mind
    
    
12. I must think Psychological at all times, NOT physical.
    

 

Thank you all so much for your sound advice. I can't express how much I appreciate your thoughts. Getting rid of my fear/anxiety is crucial. Knowing it's MBS gives me some solace by knowing that I can help myself get out of pain.

However, knowing that it's MBS gets me only so far. Is there a road map of things I need to do on a daily basis to get me to where I want to be. I've read so many different opinions on what I should do that I find myself very confused. Is the Structured Educational Program a good process to follow? My immediate problem is to calm myself down in order to follow any program. I'm really struggling with my anxiety.

I recently had a huge flare following an agressive ride on my bicycle. It has hit me hard to the point of questioning what to do and how I'm going to endure this pain for the rest of my life. My anxiety is consuming me.