Day 10 checking in

[aziemski]

This is my day 10 check in on how I'm doing with the program and my pain. I may only be on day 10 of this program, but I've been operating on the idea that my pain is due to TMS and not the bulging disc for almost 2 months now. I have read "Healing back pain" by Dr. Sarno twice now. I bought his DVD lectures and have watched them several times. I have made lists of my personality traits and life stresses that might be the cause of my pain. I have also made a list of all the evidence that suggests that my pain is emotionally related and not structural. I meditate each night before bed and i have given up all physical and pharmaceutical treatments for my pain right down to the insoles in my shoes...and yet i have not experienced any relief from the pain over the last two months. I know logically that everything about the TMS theory fits and makes sense. But i wonder if the scientist in me (I studied human Biology) is struggling to let go of the structural diagnosis. For example, when i ask a question, i already know how Dr. Sarno would answer it. And yet i still find myself asking these questions. Why does my pain increase after exercising?Dr. Sarno would say because this is a trigger and i am conditioned to expect it. Why did the pain go away for over a year when i had surgery? Dr. Sarno would say because it was a powerful placebo. Why did the pain return to the exact same place and feels exactly the same as before if it isn't related to that disc? Dr. Sarno would say because my brain is using the knowledge of this abnormality as an opportunity to disguise the pain as a structutal problem. So i know all of this....and yet i don't feel any better. :-(

 

[Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)]

Hi, aziemski. I wish I had the magic answer to why you are still in pain after doing everything TMS.
I can only think that you have not yet discovered the repressed emotions that are causing your subconscious to give you pain.
Have you been journaling, and looking into your early years? That's where most of us found our anger.

Don't discourage. You know that TMS healing takes longer for some people.

Maybe try practicing these longer versions of Dr. Sarno's 12 Daily Reminders, written by Herbie.

Herbie’s Extended Version of Dr. Sarno’s 12 DAILY REMINDERS

1. The pain is due to TMS. This is real pain or anxiety but its caused by subconscious tensions and triggers, stressors and traits to your reactions and fears and also when at boiling point your conscious tension can and does cause real pain too.
2. The main reason for the pain is mild oxygen deprivation. This means that when you get in pain or in anxiety then the the blood is restricted from going to your lower back for instance. The blood being restricted causes oxygen deprivation which causes the pain - remember, where theirs no oxygen then there is pain in the body. Also, The pain stays because of fear and focus to physical organic symptoms and repressions.
3. TMS is a harmless condition caused by my REPRESSED EMOTIONS so even though you think you can harm yourself from the years of pain you have felt and how you feel in general -- so far no reports have been heard from tms healing knowledge causing damage to anyone, it only helps.
4. The principle emotion is your repressed ANGER -- this means under your consciousness lies something that happens automatically to everyone. Tmsers have repressions that are stored because of our personality traits,traumas, stressors, fears, strain, etc... When these stored repressions build and build then eventually they cause the brain to send pain into your body to keep you from having an emotional crises. The mind-body thinks its helping you.
5. TMS exists to DISTRACT your attentions from the emotions, stressors, tensions and strains of your personality traits because if you can get distraction then you wont have to be in emotional turmoil. When you don't face and feel your emotions and they get repressed cause you didn't want to deal with something -- they are just adding up in this beaker, ready to pour over and create real pain and anxiety in your body.
6. Since my body is perfectly normal, there is nothing to fear. So in reality when I fear the pain or anxiety I just cause myself undo strain and tension adding to the beaker of pain. If I fear then I feed the pain, If I fear Its impossible to recondition. Fear keeps the pain and anxiety alive in the body through focus.
7. Therefore, physical activity is harmless.If I want to work against the pain I could but its better to lose some of the pain so when I start my life over I=t have to be in pain trying to heal cause facing the repressions and all the other activities that cause the pain and reversing my fear and focus to them then I can heal.
8. I am resuming all normal physical activity. I don't fear moving anymore. I believe in my bodies ability to heal now. I can move how I want. I will not fear moving with a bent back anymore. I will also practice going out and acting normal again, not in fear of what pain might do to me.
9. The pain is unimportant and powerless. Its only power is how its hidden -- its illusion, Its fear.
10. I will keep my attention on the emotional issues. I will think about my emotions and feel my emotions throughout the day. I will not judge, criticize or fear my emotions. I will not run from my emotional issues but face everyone of them. I will feel my emotions fully and cry if I need to. Then I will release the emotion and get my mind and thoughts back to my life and living in the present, in flow.
11. I am in control of all of this. This is how I recover.
12. I will be thinking PSYCHOLOGICALLY AT ALL TIMES. This means I will keep my thoughts on psychological issues like happiness, fear and anger -- traits and triggers, conditioning and journaling. The science behind mind-body/tms healing, etc.... This way I will not feed my thoughts to the body -- that is a trick of tms. Tms will always try to get me to focus on the body caused by the pain until I break its show and flair. When I get my attention off psychical symptoms and on emotional issues and psychological issues then I will not feed the fear of the physical issues anymore thus making the tms of no effect. This will in return, give us the cure.