I haven't had it checked out
Reminder to all forum participants: there is a disclaimer on every page of this web site which states: "If you have symptoms, see your doctor to rule out anything serious and get proper care. No information on this site should be considered medical advice."
Keffy, I understand that you're struggling, and I sympathize, but we simply cannot provide answers to medical questions. I know you keep trying to find reassurance, you've been posting on old threads trying to get responses from past users to see how they're doing, and that in your recent threads several people have already tried to offer you advice. Unfortunately, you appear to be stuck in an obsessive cycle where you are laser-focused on the physical details of your symptoms, and your TMS brain is effectively shutting out the advice to think psychologically.
You've stated elsewhere that you have had some success in the past just by having TMS knowledge, which is great. You are also experiencing a common phenomenon: after time passes, and when stressors build up again, the old knowledge alone is not enough to get past the brain's new stronger defenses. When that happens, the only way out is: 1) find the strength to think psychologically instead of physically, 2) conquer fear, and 3) finally address the repression of negative emotions.
I understand that you have severe social anxiety and also autism, which are serious hurdles, and, in the interest of not leading you on, I have to be honest and say that these issues go beyond advice that can be offered on a free self-help forum. I'm not a mental health professional, I'm just a retired tax accountant who has been on this forum for eleven years, but in my completely non-professional opinion, you need a consultation with a TMS medical professional, followed by psychotherapy.
All that being said, I will repeat the basic self-help advice that is the focus of the work we do on this forum:
1) Recovery from TMS requires abandoning all focus on physical symptoms, and to think psychologically at all times.
2) You must gain control over fear and anxiety - otherwise you are never going to overcome the TMS brain mechanism.
3) Self-acceptance and self-compassion are essential.
I really do wish you the best possible outcome.
~Jan