can journaling be unbalanced ?

nelle

nelle

Peer Supporter
Hi

Im about 17 days in , ive just had a break from the wiki for about five days as i had to much work on and ive been having problems with my partner. Ive said in other posts my partner and i argue alot more now i have joined this program . Although it is not my intention to argue it seams to be happening alot . Im wondering if me journaling about my relationship points out all the crap and tough stuff and then all the good stuff is less in focus. I m not regretting being on this program i think there is a lot of worth to it . Im just questioning if you spend every day writing out your grievances can you lose sight of the positive and then be more primed for argument .
 
Hi,Nelle. I', really sorry you're having such problems with your partner. I think you may be spending more time than is good on writing your grievences. Are there any positive things you can journal about? I think keeping positive is very important.
 
nelle said:
Hi

Im about 17 days in , ive just had a break from the wiki for about five days as i had to much work on and ive been having problems with my partner. Ive said in other posts my partner and i argue alot more now i have joined this program . Although it is not my intention to argue it seams to be happening alot . Im wondering if me journaling about my relationship points out all the crap and tough stuff and then all the good stuff is less in focus. I m not regretting being on this program i think there is a lot of worth to it . Im just questioning if you spend every day writing out your grievances can you lose sight of the positive and then be more primed for argument .
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While I think it can be beneficial to write out our grievances, there is a time when going deeper in journaling is helpful to move forward. I suggest asking questions like "What is my role in this situation?" "What are the true underlying issues?" "Is there some deep unhealed wound from the past that is being triggered in the current situation?" Also, I believe that often TMS is triggered by internal conflict. This can be identified most easily by looking for the "shoulds" or "should nots" in our thoughts, e.g. "I'm thinking, feeling, wanting, doing this, but I believe at some level that I should be thinking, feeling, wanting, doing something else." Another way to look at this is id (internal child) vs superego (internal parent). These internal conflicts create the tension that is at the heart of TMS.

Best wishes to you......
 
Hi Walt , it do sent say on the structured program to journal about positive things , dose it ?.
Im not spending more time than it tells you to spend journaling, i feel like im doing what its telling me to do .
 
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