I don't doubt TMS and I don't doubt that my physical symptoms are rooted (to a large degree at least) in emotional causes. What leaves me puzzled is this: if I don't fix my life on an emotional level, does that mean that I cannot heal my body? Basically, I have been an emotional mess ever since I can remember. I now realize that most of my successes (considered as such by the society) did not come from me living authentically but from me following someone else's directions and expectations. I am in my early forties and I don't know how to be authentically myself. I don't know who I am. I don't know what my purpose is. How I can live and work in a way that will make me happy. Whether to be single or accompanied, and if accompanied, by whom. My identity has always been fragile, certainly in my mind, and as times goes on, my notion of who I am is disintegrating more and more. To find my own voice, strength and belief in myself is, I feel, a lifelong project, not something I can achieve in a course of days, weeks, or months, by simply attending to my emotions, which is what the TMS treatment consists of. I have been looking for myself and for my place on this planet ever since I can remember. I don't expect to suddenly understand where I want to be and in which direction I should be moving because I need to do that to fix my body. I will work on it, I already do, and always have done so, but ... it IS a long process. Is healing or not healing my physical body dependent on my success to figure out my life? 2 hrs later, a thought during hoovering: perhaps the aim isn't so much to fix my life (since there will always be issues to address) as it is to ACCEPT it? ... to ACCEPT that life is a learning experience, a walk through a maze, a big puzzle I may never even see the whole picture of? Perhaps the aim isn't so much to gain control of my life, as much as it is to accept the inherent uncertainty of it and focus on and appreciate its positively overwhelming magic? Maybe the aim isn't so much to remove the stresses of life as much as it is to LEARN TECHNIQUES how to handle the stresses which are a quintessential part of being alive? Maybe the aim isn't about becoming a different person, laid back and easy going, but learning to appreciate myself, with the talents and flaws I have? Is that it? I have just listened to the webinar with Steve Ozanich and I think it is him who speaks about getting rid of TMS as "living in alignment with one's authentic self". In my experience, "finding one's "authentic self" is synonymous with being alive, it's a process, not an arrived state, so what I am asking is: can I heal my body SOON if I am a being in the making (and will be still, for a long time)?