Bloating/ body obession

Recently I will randomly get really bloated. And it's not from a kinda food cuz I'll go through phases where it stops. But it makes me really self concious when it happens and I obbsess about it a total TMS manner. Could it be TMS the cause of the random bloating. And I'm worried because I'm getting on an obsessive path that is very close to developing a full blown eating disorder. I'll eat less when I'm bloated and I've skipped meals and even once made my self throw up. i know depression and ocd can be TMS and I'm already being super ocd about this. I'll eat and go look in the mirror to see if it made me bloat or changed the flatness of my stomach. Does anyone think the bloating is caused by TMS , or could it be an actual physical thing and I'm just being ocd about it. I've just been getting really obsessed and ocd about my body and I know that depression and ocd can be TMS and I'm worried since I have TMS that I have the mind set to head down a dangerous path of an eating disorder and I wanna stop it. Either way if the bloating is TMS or physical. How I'm reacting to is completely obsessive.

 

Bloating comes and goes with hormonal changes. Kylin, please take this with the gentleness that it is written.
My sister was obsessed with every little change in her body. She was on constant stress alert and worry.
I have some of that, but she had it 10x's worse. After 3 decades of going to the doctor and getting way too many prescriptions for things she didn't need, she did get cancer. Though it was a curable cancer, she lost her life because she was stressing and obsessed with it constantly. Her body had no resources left.

I don't know how old you are, but please stop doing what you are doing right now. Stop in your tracks.
Many doctors have told you that you don't have anything. You are constantly looking for "something." You really don't want "something" to finally appear.
Do what you must to find a way to a calmer mind. I think you have too much time on your hands.
We all fear symptoms, but the work of this forum is to NOT indulge in them. It's to get mutual support to get back to living.
I cheer you on to return to a full life now. Stop looking in the mirror. Stop looking in your mouth.
Force yourself to stop. Go outside and walk around the block every time you feel an urge to look.
Talk to someone. Call someone. Ask them about THEM. Do not talk about your health issues.
Break the pattern. I think you know you're heading down the wrong path or you wouldn't have posted on this forum.

I write all of this not as criticism of you as a person, but as encouragement to make a different choice for your life.
I know my sister would have chosen differently now. You can do this. Every doctor has told you nothing is wrong.
Mouth sores are caused by an imbalance from stress. Please. Read Dr. Sarno and Steven Ozanich. Turn around while you can. And, you can.

 

Thank you for your response. And thank you for sharing about your sister. I'm so sorry. You're right. I really needed to hear this.

 

You did not say specifically where the bloating occurs, but your concern over the flatness of your stomach indicates that is the only place? Bloating in the digestive tract is a common response to IBS.

In my late teens, I became bulimic. This is a path that is very dangerous. It also damages the enamel on teeth. When I learned that particular part, it became my strongest motivation for keeping food going in the natural direction. Dentists terrified me! Not the best motivation, but it worked.

You might do some research on IBS. I managed mine with a combination of what I eat, AND the TMS aspect. I have been almost completely 'bloat-free' for over a year (there are still the random days it occurs, but I do not worry over it).

Like you, I can look at my stomach and notice any change in the shape. I have also noticed a change might occur if I am having a depressive-episode. It is guaranteed I will gain exactly two pounds when I'm in a 'crisis' of depression. That will often motivate me enough to fight back harder. When the 'crisis' is over, those extra pounds drop. Depression feels heavy, so it clearly manifests physically (for me).

Allow yourself to be curious. I use my OCD to explore and experiment. This turns the self-destructive into a self-exploration venture. Patience is important. Learn about yourself. Notice your reactions without judging them. Sort of an 'Oh, so that's what happens when .....' and 'Mm, let's see what happens when I do this ... " (this = something constructive and compassionate).

Our bodies are ever-changing, and they respond to both emotional and environmental and the various energies that are part of the fabric of our lives. It is up to us to learn to navigate through all that gently and with awareness.

Give yourself time. You can do this.
You have so much more power than you think.
I believe in you <3

.... with Love and Gratitude ^_^

 

Thank you so much for everyone's support! I am so proud you healed and I know I can too.

 

Kylin, thanks for sharing your story. I have a background in having an eating disorder (for almost 20 years) and it was terrible. I hope you are able to stay away from that and spend your time so much more enjoyably. Hope you are feeling well. Let us know.

 

I find it very interesting for lack of a better word, that you mention eating disorders. I had eating disorders for more than ten years before I got TMS. I always thought there is a connection there, but google doesnt show much connection between these two. My TMS came on after my eating disorder was seemingly somewhat under control for the last couple years and didnt have such a central role in my life as before. So I suppose there is something in me that was being managed by eating disorder and when that stopped working, TMS came to continue its work.

 

I think that there is likely a big link between eating disorders and TMS. I myself suffered from several years of chronic dieting/disordered eating and recovered from this with the help of a therapist. The personality traits likely to get both an ED and TMS are similar- perfectionist, people pleasing, highly sensitive, goodist. I learned that in a way, eating disorders and body image issues are a version of TMS themselves- a psychic guise for deeper problems underneath. For me, the chronic dieting was a way to try to bring control to my life when other things were out of control...there were other deeper issues beneath the surface. I also realized that negative body image thoughts were their own type of TMS, a distractor for deeper self-critical thoughts, fears and angers. I definitely think an ED can function as a form of TMS, just as anxiety and depression can as well.

 

@Kylin Foster

Hopefully your symptoms have chilled out in the past few weeks. What you're describing sounds like IBS, something a lot of people on here have had issues with, myself included off and on. But, I can tell you from experience if you starve yourself and then consume say a sandwich, that little bit of food will cause a bloating effect on the body. Understand there are a lot of [psychological] moving parts with eating or lack thereof.

It sounds like you're way too consumed with your consumption. You really need to recognize when you're overthinking your eating and try to redirect yourself back to a normal schedule.

Your response to bloating is no different than the response of others on this forum, to their own issues. It starts with a symptom and spirals into an obsession. You have to take a moment to review the thoughts leading up to the symptom and wonder if there's a psychological or emotional component, and if you can comfortably accept that there is reassure yourself that it's fine and that you'll resume your normal schedule as best as possible. Your body will naturally move back to its equilibrium if you let it.

Whatever you do don't push yourself back to normal. Just let it happen, and if you feel hungry eat. If you feel bloated and not hungry, let the bloat happen.

Be comfortable with the discomfort.