Day 1 Beginning

[haushinka]

I started my fight against TMS this week. I started reading Dr. Sarno's Healing Back Pain last month but it wasn't until I downloaded the audio books that I really started to believe in TMS. I saw myself in almost every personality trait, whether only a little or full out. I had a lot of doubts going back to my MRI constantly. I have numbness in the left front of my thigh. It changes how numb it is from just above the knee to sometimes half way to the hip. It sometimes goes away with very light tingling numbness remaining and sometimes it aches as if someone has punched me all down my leg. Sometimes I will have a sharp stabbing pain in areas. It's very sensitive to the touch. I woke up this way last May and at first wasn't worried about it until I went to the doctor. After it didn't go away they sent me for an xray and an MRI and said I had a herniation between the 4th and 5th disc. After this diagnosis of course my symptoms became worse which I thought was weird. I was sent for physio which never really helped and if anything made it worse. The more I read about TMS the more I've had other symptoms which made me really believe the diagnosis of TMS. When I start focusing on my leg pain and knowing it's TMS then my neck will lock up and get tight and painful, or my lower back will start aching, or pins and needles in my arms or fingers, or stabbing pain in my lower leg or burning sensation. I find the more I confront TMS the more it tried to convince me of a problem. I find when I really confront things and the pain reduces than I can get an almost crippling anxiety.


Another reason I've been so convinced of TMS is that I've always had stress induced tension head aches, back spasms, neck pain, dry eyes, stomach issues. All at different times through my life. I'm very neat and orderly. I expect a lot from myself and others and I was brought up in a strict Christian household with a demanding angry father and strict adherence to right and wrong.


Also my symptoms started this year the same month I moved into my new builder house. I had a huge list of things that had to be done, I started work on finishing my basement the same month. Dealing with all the installation issues, my son has had croup and a lot of struggles fitting in at school and my daughter started this year as well and hasn't wanted to go. As well my son became obsessed with asking about death and really got me worried about my own mortality. There was a multitude of other things going on at this time as well and I can't help but think this is the perfect storm for a real dose of TMS.


I've started to dwell on things that are bothering me whenever I feel the onset of symptoms, I've gone back to no physical restrictions and I read Dr. Sarno's books every day and write down my issues. I've ordered his DVD lectures and also the Great Pain Deception which should be arriving soon. Does anyone have any other advice or recommendations I should do?


Thank you.

 

[hopeful_guitarist]

You're on the right track! I'm on Day 5 of the Structured Educational Program and learning a lot so far. I'm about 3 weeks into researching TMS (found Dr. Sarno's book on New Year's Eve) and feeling really hopeful. I've completely stopped the hundred other things I've been doing - ice packs, hot packs, inversion table, vitamins and supplements, lumbar cushions, stretches, etc. And the pain is going away. I'd love it to go away faster but I'll take what I can get.

 

[haushinka]

Thank you. I appreciate the encouragement. I will follow your progress and will offer any encouragement I can to a fellow guitarist.

 

[Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)]

Hi, haushinka. It looks to me like you will find relief from your pains by doing the journaling in the SEProgram. You write that your childhood was stressful. I discovered in journaling that I was repressing anger and other emotions since my parents divorced when I was seven. I can remember having lots of happy times a boy, but subconsciously buried the other times. You are going to put your past to rest and, as I was able to, forgive those who gave you problems, like your father.

Hopeful guitarist's reply is great and gives you confidence you are going to heal. Be patient and believe in TMS. You have begun a very exciting journey into self-discovery It is going to not only heal your pains, but make you a happier person.

When anxiety comes on, remember to take deep breaths and calming thoughts and images. Do something to take your mind off feeling anxious... exercise, even if just taking a short walk, or some household chore.

 

[Alibumbayay]

Welcome to the forum! I am also early in my treatment and have not yet discovered the "trick," but I'm doing all the things you are doing and feel hopeful. I wish you luck and look forward to reading your progress.