Beginning the Journey

I recently joined this forum and I am so glad I found it. Such lovely helpful and supportive people.

I live in Scotland and realise now that I have suffered with TMS since about the age of 15. I came across Dr Sarno's work whilst searching for help for my hip/groin/leg pain which I had had for 2 years. I have read two of his books and also Steve O's and just started another. It's like the scales have been lifted from my eyes. My most recent symptoms started 2 years ago after a horse riding incident but I realise that almost every pain I have ever had (not counting childbirth!) was/is TMS. I think when I read that it can cause recurring bladder problems I was convinced. So, everything from bladder problems, IBS, tennis elbow, frozen shoulder to the most recent will now be consigned to the TMS dustbin.

I totally get that my unconscious mind is capable of causing all this - but I think it just threw all the toys out of the pram when it realised I was onto it! Still limping along last week with the groin/leg pain, I then got hit with a hideous IBS attack and then along came cystitis/UTI. I mean really! Everything at once.

However, when the UTI hit, I thought just wait a minute - I know what's going on here. So instead of wailing at the unfairness of it all, I talked kindly to myself and didn't reach for the usual quack remedies. I have been drinking a lot of water but I tend to do that anyway. Normally by now I'd be in tears with the pain, but I'm NOT.

I am optimistic that I will beat the UTI but my ongoing leg pain is concerning me as to how I deal with it. I limp. I have limped for 2 years and now I think it is just a habit, but it's really difficult to break. I realised that I had a 'thing' about getting back on my horse so I have done that twice in the last week and felt good (still sore though). Part of my problem is that the first thing everyone says to me (with a 'poor you' expression on their face) is 'how are you?, how's the leg?' I need to find a way to politely ask them not to as I don't want to draw attention to it.

I go to the gym 2-3 times a week and can do recumbent bike (half hour) cross trainer 20mins and various weights - but a different matter altogether to be moving about the house making dinner or doing the housework!

Thank you for reading this and it's so uplifting to know that I am not alone.

 

This is HUGE! Congratulations! I know it can be easy to quickly move onto focusing on the next "problem" after you've made progress on one, almost like a checklist (beating UTI, check, now onto beating leg pain) but really take some time to be in the moment and feel proud of yourself. It's important, I think, to take that time and really sit with those positive feelings. It reinforces that you CAN do this! Also - you deserve it!

 

I would just answer people with "It's fine" or "it's improving, thanks for asking," and then move on to other topics. I have the same problem with my foot. I realize people are asking because they are concerned, so I answer minimally. If they press the issue, I will say "I'd really rather not talk about it--talking about it seems to make it worse." They take the hint and move on to other topics.