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Beginner needing advice

Discussion in 'Support Subforum' started by David B, Dec 15, 2013.

  1. David B

    David B Well known member

    Hi all

    I hit what I think was the pain bottom on my TMS journey 5 weeks ago. After slipping back towards the traditional medical route for the first four weeks out of anxiety and frustration, I reread part of Dr Schubiner's book last week and it rekindled my conviction that I am dealing w TMS/MBS.

    I tossed the pain and muscle relaxers in the trash. I got rid of my work/living set up around the bed and for the past three days have been easing back into something close to a normal day. Shoveled and pushed snow for an hour today - it was awesome to be outside being physical again!

    My question is about giving into the pain a bit when you're completely worn down. I am writing this lying down because I was sitting at my desk and the pain wouldn't let up. I tried to acknowledge and move on. I tried yelling at my mind. I cried in frustration. I used Dr Schubiner's acupressure/affirmation technique. Eventually I just had to lie down, I was exhausted. Am I completely undermining my efforts when I give myself some time in a position that provides relief?

    Thanks on advance for any thoughts.
     
    Eric "Herbie" Watson likes this.
  2. Eric "Herbie" Watson

    Eric "Herbie" Watson Beloved Grand Eagle

    Hey man its perfectly normal what your doing. Just lighten up a little, you made me feel tired-- keep the thoughts off the body while soothing ok. That's what you should be doing when your not in the battle. The good fight of faith, Alhough I believe you can do it at a much calmer level you seem to be getting some benefit from your efforsts -- so its what works for you right.

    See I fought through the pain and stuggled hard like your doing and I was getting forward movement ya know but it was when I decided to lighten up on myself and know that the knowledge is the penicillian. Its when you accept this 100 % in your unconscious that youll start to make better jumps in your healing.

    Its not about how hard you can hit, its about how hard can ya sooth ya know. Can you be patient and trust the steps to recovery as they are the steps that heal with the reprogramming of your belief system regardless if you get your muscles involved or not. The thing is if that's what worked for you then do it cause it helped me a lot in the beginning. How far into the program are you? Let me know and we can go further.

    Look to peace and know the knowledge will cure you ok.

    Bless You

    P. S. - The ignore method and Working through the pain is to show your muscles whose in control which will enforce your efforts to reprogram. But if your making matters to tense then you could be adding to the fire so balance your work load in baby steps- real slow and smooth, with belief as character.
     
    Last edited: Dec 16, 2013
  3. David B

    David B Well known member

    Thanks so much for the advice and for asking to know more. It means a lot to know I'm not alone In the process and those who have come before me can give some guidance. My wife is super understanding and caring but hasn't been through it. She has also said some magical things at just the right time, one of which echoes your advice to be easy on myself, the opposite of how my mind has always treated me.

    I started down the journey in mid august: stopped physical therapy, started working on Dr. schubiner's book, taking over the counter pain meds mostly before bed because that's when it was the worst and my sleep was a wreck. By November I was starting to get my sleep back with help of a therapist, I had glimmers that my symptoms were getting better. In fact the week before I hit bottom I had two experiences of being able to sit with no symptoms for 2-3 hours, that hadn't happened in at least 6 months. 2nd week of November I'm working out, dealing with the symptoms and in the middle of an excercise I get twinge that's different, everything tightens up, next morning I can't move. I was In such agony the following night my wife almost called the ambulance. Doc prescribes muscle relaxers and pain meds and in a few days Ive improved enough to get to the doc. Fortunately my spine doc still doesn't want to operate unless I don't don't keep improving; I also learn as I'm walking out the door that he read a bit of Sarno every day! Didn't have a chance to ask why he never said anything before.

    Two weeks ago a physical therapist suggests that my symptoms might move around so much because I have a piece of disc floating around. I ask the doc for another MRI and guess what, nothing changed from the one they took in June. I'm thinking that's suspicious to say the least. And that's where this thread begins: w me rereading Schubiner and getting reignited...

    Thanks for reading and any more words of wisdom.

    Be well Eric (or do you prefer Herbie)
     
    Eric "Herbie" Watson likes this.
  4. Ruth_L

    Ruth_L Peer Supporter

    Sending good thoughts your way. I say this to all the back people, look up backbends yoga as well as do this program. We go forward all the time, we lean forward always, the backbend stuff, like the exercise cobra for instance is fantastic. It's all work we have to do to get better.
     
    Eric "Herbie" Watson likes this.
  5. Eric "Herbie" Watson

    Eric "Herbie" Watson Beloved Grand Eagle

    The Id, Ego- Super-Ego Relation to pain

    This is a knowing now that your mind has given you a hard time. It makes the body tense and it also makes us tired from over worked strain in our bodies cause as you know when we think of something -- however that is -- Then we get the exact treatment as if we were in the natural thick of things hence a speedy heart and tiredness so we have to combat this with self compassion ok.

    The next time you hear yourself telling yourself that you could have done better, well right then is the time to say now hold on. Its ok, ill let this pass and ill get with it better soon " No use in being so hard anymore, I got its trick, I see what im doing now" and I can do this with will training over time. I will, I must. Then say to yourself, "Its ok I love you". Yes say this -- it will make your body release tension that your super-ego has set in you through thoughts like " You should have done that better and how come you waited so long to do this project" you will also feel this emotionally if you don't get something done or accomplished to your desire.

    See we have three minds working. The super-ego, Id and Ego. Your super ego is always wanting you to do better and live up to your expectations and the id wants you to stop taking orders from your super-ego and get you to have fun in the sun and relaxing , having a good time and so forth so we have to bring this into balance by "centering" . We give the id what it wants, relaxation. Peace, happiness and joy through mental will training by observing that this side of who we are has to be soothed. Like when is the next time you want to do something just for fun, then is the time to make plans just for that, hence freeing the id to be free. Making yourself happy in a soothing way.

    Then you have this next time when your mind will say I got to get this project done and this is when you say ok ill get the fun done first then after this ill go and get that project done in three days. Then stick to your guns cause you just agreed to the super-ego which can be very pushy. Now after you decided to please both id and super ego then do it and this will bring you back to balance and as I've said -- You will have to practice this ok and give it plenty of time doing it everyday. Every moment of everyday as you grow over a period of weeks to months. Then you will be able to get into balance with less effort if you were to slide.

    Going easy on yourself will bring a balance that will effect a cure but also maintaining that balance with the super ego and letting its power be the guide too. This way the ego which is the part of you that only you know , your true self will not be so tired and anxious having to dispute between these two forces of the mind

    David B)- I started down the journey in mid august: stopped physical therapy, started working on Dr. schubiner's book, taking over the counter pain meds mostly before bed because that's when it was the worst and my sleep was a wreck. By November I was starting to get my sleep back with help of a therapist, I had glimmers that my symptoms were getting better. In fact the week before I hit bottom I had two experiences of being able to sit with no symptoms for 2-3 hours, that hadn't happened in at least 6 months. 2nd week of November I'm working out, dealing with the symptoms and in the middle of an excercise I get twinge that's different, everything tightens up, next morning I can't move. I was In such agony the following night my wife almost called the ambulance. Doc prescribes muscle relaxers and pain meds and in a few days Ive improved enough to get to the doc. Fortunately my spine doc still doesn't want to operate unless I don't don't keep improving; I also learn as I'm walking out the door that he read a bit of Sarno every day! Didn't have a chance to ask why he never said anything before.

    Eric)- ok David this is where the bullet hits the bone. Are you going to believe that this pain is generated from your mind because you have the evidence or are you going to think physical which has not gotten rid of the pain yet. You have to decide 100% that's its the tension, strain and stress thoughts that your unconscious of that are creating pain in your body ok. Its ok to doubt this at first, its normal. A new paradigm not like you've grown accustomed too with your belief system so you have to recondition your belief system.

    You have to know that thinking about the physical as this could be hitting a nerve or anything like that will hinder you so you have to be open to get a new idea in your mindbody now that will set you free. Its your nervous tension that has generated this pain and its from anger and fear thoughts that go on unconsciously all day long.

    David B)- Two weeks ago a physical therapist suggests that my symptoms might move around so much because I have a piece of disc floating around. I ask the doc for another MRI and guess what, nothing changed from the one they took in June. I'm thinking that's suspicious to say the least. And that's where this thread begins: w me rereading Schubiner and getting reignited...

    Thanks for reading and any more words of wisdom.

    Be well Eric (or do you prefer Herbie)

    Eric)- Your my friend now David, you can call me Herbie if you wish. Now the moving around pain is called the symptom imperative. Its only because that's the way tms works. It tries to make you think you have pain here and there and then maybe you wont believe that this phenomena is really tension induced ya know. So know that whether the pain moves or stays or gets weaker or stronger its still tms and will always do all of the above till you get that balance that I mentioned above.

    You want to calm the inner child, the id-- then go and meditate for real-- mindfulness is good and you want to really get a hold on the super ego then still in all manner of your actions lighten up on yourself and agree with yourself that this is ok and you will actually get more done in the day and heal too. There's more to know as you can tell by reading Shubiners book but id make sure to get on board the SEP here at the wiki ok. It will compliment your Shubiner studies and teach you more on how to get this balance back in line ok.

    Thanks
     
    Last edited: Dec 17, 2013
  6. David B

    David B Well known member

    Herbie,

    Its great to have a new friend! Friends are one of life's great blessings. You my friend are now my blessing.

    My conviction in MBS/TMS has growing every day over the past week. In fact as I write this I sense the only doubts in my being come from the id/child who is almost always afraid but getting less so as I improve and my super ego/parent-tyrant who thinks we should be cured by now. My spiritual self/big mind is 100% convinced.

    Why? Because of the day last week I got the news that for all the changes in my symptoms nothing changed in my structure. Not that I would recommend everyone follow the traditional medical path to gain conviction in TMS but it was a blessing for me. The traditional doctors couldn't come up with an explanation. It confirmed what the good Drs Sarno, Schubiner and Hanscom told me through their books: there isnt a structural explanation for my pain so it must come from my mind!

    You are so right about the balance. I thought over the years I was creating balance by meditating, practicing tai chi, fishing, for a few hours here and there. Im beginning to see that while I got some benefits from them I was creating an artificial balance. It was artificial because (1) I tried to use them as counter-weights to the pressure of the super ego/tyrant-parent in specific blocks of time instead of doing them with joy and no expectation of an outcome; and (2) because the rest of the time, which is most of the time, I wasn't really listening to the id/child or the super-ego even though they were driving my behavior and emotions. I wasnt giving them attention or love throughout the day and I certainly had no thought of love for my total self.

    I have written a list of affirmations and taped them to the bathroom mirror so I see them at least twice a day, once in the morning and once at night. I have modified them every other day for the past week as I refine what I need to reinforce my journey. You have inspired me to make a modification to not always fight the super-ego/parent/tyrant. Sometimes it needs real attention and love too.

    I believe in Hoffman terms this would be the equivalent to giving love to the intellect. Its been 10 years since my Hoffman graduation and I am going back to the tools and so happy to have them.

    Be well.
     
    Eric "Herbie" Watson likes this.
  7. Eric "Herbie" Watson

    Eric "Herbie" Watson Beloved Grand Eagle

    Wow, this is it David B , You have a total understanding of the cure.
    Im glad to have you as a friend too. Now take some time and let this work for you.
    When you take a step back its ok cause you will still be healing as much as when you go forth,
    another notch in the path to healing.
    Outcome independence is the goal and I believe you got that down.
    Thank you so much
     

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