Back pain, sciatica, recovery and relapse, need help

Hello I am French and use google translation. I have always had a lot of symptoms, palpitations, plantar arch, back pain since adolescence, chronic fatigue, ... Then during a handball match, big injury, shot of electricity in the back. After, lying down for 15 days, contracted back, pains. Then, sciatica appeared, several years of pain (3 years), I saw many doctors, passed an irm (disk herniation l5 s1, multiple disc discs), a doctor advised a fusion, others not. I have tried everything. Then I came across the books of sarno, back sense, and the forum. Gradually, resumed running, cycling, I felt better, I managed to have more pain for several months. There was always a little pain a few times, but I was not functionally limited.
BUT, two months ago, the pain reappeared after the holidays, with symptoms of lumbar muscle contractions, pain in the right leg, left leg, tingling, muscle weakness (more rare). Very changeable symptoms, despite everything I continue the sport, running 12 km, bike 50 60kms, it relieves me after the effort, little pain during. By cons work days can be difficult, often standing, but as soon as I activate a little it is better. The first pains appeared in a difficult context, death, birth, trip to work, 4 years ago.
I have always felt anxiety and I have episodes of insomnia.
The first time the independence of the result and the resumption of the sport helped me as well as the structured program.
I stopped all work, because of the relapse. I need help, I continue the sport that gives me confidence but I have pain in the meantime, I took again meditation and writing.
Yesterday muscular weakness in the leg that made me very anxious, but at the end of the day I did 50 kilometers of bike ... this is very similar to TMS.
I never had a TMS diagnosis, but I was painless for a year, which is a good test.
I am open to all advice, I tried to contact therapists by mail, you know who works remotely?
Thank you

 

Hi cece71, I'm French too and it's not common here, so I feel like I should answer your message, even though I'm not a 100% success story myself ... yet !

The fact that activity makes you better and that you had a year of painless life is a definitive sign that you are, indeed, suffering with TMS and not some structural issue. But as long as there is still fear somewhere in your mind - you say the pain you felt yesterday made you feel anxious), the symptoms will keep reappearing.

I'd say that, according to what I've read on this forum this far, there are 3 "schools" of healing :
- the pure Sarnoists : reading the books, watching the videos, journaling... i.e., using what one could say is the original method used by Sarno ;
- the Sarnoists with benefits : adding some techniques/programs, for example the SEP program on this website, to the original Sarno method ;
- the Fuck-it-all'ers : letting go of everything, including the idea of having to heal.
I think you need to find your own way. Seeing a TMS therapist can get you on track and the confirmation of your diagnosis can be a powerful tool, but in the end, whatever floats your boat and helps your mind accept the diagnosis 100% is good. As for myself, I'm leaning more and more towards Fuck-it-all'ism .

 

Bonjour, merci pour la réponse, avez-vous vu un thérapeute? Tu vis en France?

Le groupe de fuck-it-all'ers est tentant, mais vous travaillez avec quoi lâcher?
C'est l'indépendance du résultat au sens large décrit par Gordon Allan ...

 

Non, je n'ai pas vu de thérapeute, car effectivement je vis en France et à ma connaissance, il n'y aucun spécialise du TMS dans notre pays (ou alors, il y en a, mais on ne les trouve pas par une recherche internet). J'ai déjà pensé à faire une consultation par Skype avec un thérapeute basé à l'étranger, mais pour être franche j'en ai plutôt marre des consultations médicales, et comme je suis certaine de mon diagnostic (allez, à 99,99% on va dire), je n'en ressens pas forcément le besoin pour l'instant.

Pour le lâcher-prise, justement, ce n'est pas à proprement parler un travail (du moins d'après moi, tout ça reste une approche très personnelle). Simplement, ça fait 10 ans que je me tape des symptômes de fibromyalgie, un intestin irritable depuis mon enfance (et une autre maladie, typiquement féminine, par-dessus tout ça), et j'ai passé un temps énorme à chercher sur le net quel régime alimentaire adopter, quelle plante prendre, quel médecin voir, etc. Et je constate que j'ai de meilleurs résultats en disant "fuck off" à mes symptômes quand ils apparaissent qu'en me concentrant dessus tout le temps, y compris en essayant de suivre un programme TMS en ligne. Encore une fois, ça peut changer, mais mon problème c'est vraiment la peur, et je sais que j'ai besoin d'apprendre à tout accepter sans chercher directement un moyen de "faire face".

Par contre, j'ai vu une psy l'an dernier et ça m'a pas mal aidée.

Je ne sais pas si c'est plus clair ?

 

yes, thanks