Hi all. My back pain journey started 5 years ago, when my first child was 10 months old, at which time my back "went out" for the first time. It resolved within a week. 2 years later, I had a second baby, a new (old) house that my husband and I were working on, and my second episode of back pain. This time, it was in my lower back instead of my upper back. Since then, my back has gone from "going out" with increasing frequency to being in continuous pain. Six weeks ago, I got a cramp in my right glute, and the next day I woke up with debilitating sciatic pain. I have been in physical therapy for months, tried chiropractic, acupuncture, cupping, steroids, NSAIDS, massage, traction, craniosacral therapy, and probably other things that I've forgotten. Steroids gave me partial relief for a few days, but once I'd taken the full course the pain level crept back up. I know you can all relate to my profound frustration and sadness at these symptoms and the feeling of increasing disability. Dealing with this while caring for 2 young kids has been especially hard, physically and emotionally. I'm a typical TMS personality, and like so many others I recognized myself on every page of The Mindbody Prescription. Intellectually, I believe (and indeed, have known for some time based on a few experiences where emotional stress or release either escalated or relieved my pain immediately) that the source of my pain is emotional. But I have so much fear, especially when the pain is intense, and my brain is so relentless in making me afraid. This is a hindrance to me in accepting the diagnosis. It's only Day 1, though, so I'm trying not to bully myself about this lack of perfect acceptance. I'm just going to go with it and trust that full acceptance will come.