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Anxiety over no apparent purpose in life.

Discussion in 'General Discussion Subforum' started by TrustIt, Jun 13, 2020.

  1. TrustIt

    TrustIt Well known member

    Hello Dearest All,
    My 10+ year search for an insane post nasal drip problem sent me on a journey of frustration and powerlessness beyond anything I had ever experienced. That led to awful digestive issues which lasted a few years until I read in Steve's book, The Great Pain Deception, that it too can be tms. As soon as I read about tension, I realized how much I was holding in my torso fighting against the stomach pain. In only two days that disappeared, and I started letting go of my fear of food, and began to eat like I want again. Digestion is 95% better. The post nasal drip is still there but is 75% better, now in a range that is easier to accept and float with. Working on it.

    Now for the strange part. Now that my body is getting back to its healthy state, I find I have absolutely no motivation to do anything... not one hobby or task interests me and THIS is when my anxiety kicks in. I feel ridiculous even admitting this. I really have no external anxiety producing issues. In other words, I am secure financially and have a wonderful loving relationship. A truly ideal situation in all regards. I have great friends and can see no reason whatsoever not to be enjoying life to its fullest. If I only knew what that is!

    At a point, I realized that it was my own ocd level of responsibility that was creating much of my anxiety. I just didn't want to do things I didn't want to do. I didn't want to talk to people I didn't want to talk to. I felt selfish and lazy and ungrateful and above all irresponsible which is a big no no for me (ummhmm you say)...thus guilt and shame.

    Now that these physical symptoms have tapered down to manageable and better, I'm guessing my mind needs something to be agitated about...the problem/solution machine needs something to resolve. As long as my body was feeling symptoms, I had excuses for saying no to life. Now that they are disappearing, what shall I do! Does anyone else feel pressure/anxiety from simply not finding purpose?

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