Amazon reviews compared to education programme/ forum use

[UkAdR]

Hi all,

I am working my way through the structured education programme at the moment, up to day 10. I am noticing some small improvement so far, but not too much. Enjoying the thought that this may work though and staying as positive as possible. Hoping to avoid spinal fusion surgery and get my life back.

My question to other to ponder is this:

I read the Amazon reviews quite a lot, as they are really reassuring and inspiring. One thought that often creeps into my head, however, is 'wow, they sound like they recovered easy'. The reviews quite often say 'I read the book, and 6 weeks later I was better'. Now I know this isn't an instant 'book cure', and that's not what I want. But do you think those people had to pay as much attention to their recovery as people like us using this site are? I have in my head a vision of them reading the book, carrying on with their lives, and just getting better. I, however, am journaling and trying hard to think psychological as much as possible - it feels like I am making a real effort.

Did they...? What do you think...?

 

[Mermaid]

Hi UkAdR,

Welcome to the forum

One of the hinderances to healing from TMS pain is impatience. I know it's tempting to check yourself over thinking "is it gone yet ?", but this is still giving attention to the pain by focusing on whether or not it's there. Every time you catch yourself doing this, switch your thinking over to "how am I feeling emotionally."

TMS pain is a habit, which takes time, patience and practice to lose.

The big question of "how long" has no answer I'm afraid. It's all down to the individual, but from what I've gathered it's very rare to heal so quickly. There are an infinite number of variables at work, so it's impossible to estimate.

I've been working on TMS healing for 2 years now, and I am almost pain free. I was very sick with frequent migraines, permanent headache, fibromyalgia, nerve pain, bladder control problems and insomia. I've had a lot of ups and downs as we all do, but I've made great progress. Don't let my account scare you, we are all different.

Once you lose your fear of the pain your focus shifts away from it, so it no longer acts as a distraction, and having lost it's purpose fades away.

Just carry on with the SEP, you'll be fine, this stuff really works you know !

 

[Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)]

Hi, UKA dR, you were given some very good advice from Mermaid, a frequent poster who knows a lot about TMS and healing.
I too wished I had been healed of back pain just by knowing it is TMS caused and reading the Sarno book Healing Back Pain.
But it took more time and effort before becoming pain-free and it was worth it.

By practicing Sarno's 12 Daily Reminders and journaling, I learned more about myself than I ever thought possible.
I learned perseverance, patience, understanding, forgiveness and other essentials to a happy, healthy life.

I consider the back pain I got that led me to learn about TMS a blessing in disguise. If I had been healed in one day
I would never have learned so much more that I needed to.

So stick with the SEP and journaling and deep breathing, meditation, relaxation, keeping active in everyday activities,
and think positive. You're make it. You're on your way to total healing and being happy with life.

 

[UkAdR]

Thanks for the replies.

I understand what you are saying. What I mean though, is, do you think that reading the reviews can sometimes be counter productive? Is there any real truth in the healing in 2 - 6 weeks thing? I have read many times in Dr Sarno's books that 'most people' will heal in 2 - 6 weeks. However, when looking at accounts/stories on a site like it seems like many people take a lot longer.

Do you all actually know of people from this site that healed within a 6 week timeline?

I know its fairly obvious from my questions that I am anxious about my own timeline of healing, but I think it will help me to understand both eventualities; a.) is there a real chance of healing in 6 weeks putting the steps into practice everyday, or b.) is it more realistic to think that the 2 - 6 week healing stories actually only account for a very small percentage of cases, and the majority take a far longer period?

Last point - is it actually a contentious point in that case then that Dr Sarno's books suggest that healing is fairly rapid once you accept the diagnosis, when in fact for most people, the process is a longer one?

Thanks folks

Adam

 

[Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)]

Adam, healing from TMS pain is a matter of "different strokes for different folks."
It took me about three months to heal from back pain after reading Healing Back Pain,
but I think I would have healed faster if I had believed 100 percent that it was from psychological
and not structural problems. I kept holding back about 10 per cent that it was structural, from
being 83 years old. Once I really believed it was 100 percent TMS, I healed.

Also, the unconscious mind is sometimes slow to "get it," that we believe in TMS,
so it doesn't stop the pain instantly. We have to keep telling it we believe in TMS.

And it doesn't help to keep wanting to heal immediately. When we put a clock or calendar
on our healing, it slows it down.

Patience is not easy when we're in pain, but we have to avoid being impatient in how
long it takes to be pain-free.

Keep at TMS-ing and you will heal.

 

[UkAdR]

I agree with this Walt, and its really the point I am making. I don't think that the overriding message from a lot of the literature is that the unconscious mind is slow to learn, from my interpretation anyway. I guess once you fully understand and digest the material that becomes clearer, but initially many of the stories, especially in Healing back pain, go something like this:

" a young man came with horrific lower back pain. Once he recognised that his pain was linked to the anguish he felt about his father, his pain faded and he healed" (that's not an actual story by the way, but an example similar to many anecdotes in the book)

I know that even in that story there is probably lots of unmentioned work, but the idea it initially gives you is "you understand, and poof! you heal".

Its helping me know more realising how patient I need to be. It also comes to Forest's "can you work too hard at TMS" pain video where he says he healed better when he stopped caring. Its so, so hard to try and not care about something you have thought about almost exclusively for many, many months. I know its what I need to do, and I will do it!

Thanks for the reply,

Adam

 

[yb44]

One thing I would like to add to Walt's post is that there are people who heal quickly, usually from back pain, but then weeks, months and sometimes many years later another unexplained symptom appears and has them back at the doctor going through a battery of blood tests, x-rays, MRIs and so forth. They may eventually come to realise this new symptom is also TMS but by most accounts that I have read, they often don't. They fear this new symptom because it's not "in the book". They seek assurances from people who have this very same symptom. They are afraid and do not believe 100% that this time it really is TMS. So take these instant cure stories with a grain of salt. If you see progress, even with the odd setback, just keep doing whatever has been helpful for you without force or strain, i.e. trying too hard. You will get there when you get there.

I recommend you have a read of Alan Gordon's post about outcome independence.
http://www.tmswiki.org/forum/threads/a-word-about-outcome-independence.562/

 

[Yoga Lady]

I totally agree with the post above. I recovered from TMS about 12 years ago after being in miserable back, butt ands leg pain rather easily. However, 5 heard later got the pain back. I went to the Dr. And my MRI showed all kinds of problems. I thought this time it was structural as previously my MRIs were very good. To make a long story shorter, I ended up,having spinal fusion L4L5. Two years later I still have the pain. I now know it is TMS rearing it's ugly head again. I have been working on healing now for about 5 months. I realize it takes confidence not only in the diagnosis that you have TMS, but you also need the confidence that you will heal! I am having trouble with this part. You really have to believe you will get better! I know I will get better because I am a fighter. We all have our own timeframe and you are not alone in taking awhile for sure!!

 

[Solange]

UkAdR, I'm a year or so in to healing and much, much better than I was. Initially, I too got quite anxious about my rate of healing progress and this doubt and anxiety slowed things down. I would have been helped more at the outset by reading stories about people who took longer to heal than the 'book cures.'
I think my conscious mind accepted TMS fairly readily but my unconscious one has put up more of a fight!Mermaid sums it up so well by saying that TMS is a pain 'habit' which takes time and patience to lose. That has been the case for me after years of suffering pain and much conditioning which has promoted great fear around certain activities.
It's hard, but try not to count the days;it will not help you. Just persevere,keep putting one foot in front of the other knowing that you are heading in the right direction and try to be kind to yourself.Keep at it!A year ago, I was in daily pain and hardly able to do anything for myself. A year on and I can sit comfortably, wash my hair, put my shoes on, pick things up off the floor and drive easily-I could not do any of this a year ago.Like Mermaid says, this stuff works!

 

[Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)]

Your good news is wonderful, Solange, that you have come so far in your healing. Yes, it takes time,
and who really knows why some heal faster than others. Your ability to do things you couldn't do before
is a sure sign that you are recovering and doing the right things.

I can hardly believe that at almost 84 I can bend down without pain to pick up Annie's poop in the yard.

 

[Mermaid]

UkAdR, I'm a year or so in to healing and much, much better than I was. Initially, I too got quite anxious about my rate of healing progress and this doubt and anxiety slowed things down. I would have been helped more at the outset by reading stories about people who took longer to heal than the 'book cures.'
I think my conscious mind accepted TMS fairly readily but my unconscious one has put up more of a fight!Mermaid sums it up so well by saying that TMS is a pain 'habit' which takes time and patience to lose. That has been the case for me after years of suffering pain and much conditioning which has promoted great fear around certain activities.
It's hard, but try not to count the days;it will not help you. Just persevere,keep putting one foot in front of the other knowing that you are heading in the right direction and try to be kind to yourself.Keep at it!A year ago, I was in daily pain and hardly able to do anything for myself. A year on and I can sit comfortably, wash my hair, put my shoes on, pick things up off the floor and drive easily-I could not do any of this a year ago.Like Mermaid says, this stuff works!

Hi Solange

What a great post ! You've made fantastic progress, well done you !! I found the more active I became, the more confidence I had, so I was able to relax and just let healing happen on it's own.

If we picked a TMS book up that said in the preface "This could take 10 days, or 10 years.........who knows ?" We would be discouraged from even trying it. Better to start from a place of hope and optimism surely.

Keep up the good work, I'll meet you at the winning post

 

[Eric "Herbie" Watson]

I agree with this Walt, and its really the point I am making. I don't think that the overriding message from a lot of the literature is that the unconscious mind is slow to learn, from my interpretation anyway. I guess once you fully understand and digest the material that becomes clearer, but initially many of the stories, especially in Healing back pain, go something like this:

" a young man came with horrific lower back pain. Once he recognised that his pain was linked to the anguish he felt about his father, his pain faded and he healed" (that's not an actual story by the way, but an example similar to many anecdotes in the book)

I know that even in that story there is probably lots of unmentioned work, but the idea it initially gives you is "you understand, and poof! you heal".

Its helping me know more realising how patient I need to be. It also comes to Forest's "can you work too hard at TMS" pain video where he says he healed better when he stopped caring. Its so, so hard to try and not care about something you have thought about almost exclusively for many, many months. I know its what I need to do, and I will do it!

Thanks for the reply,

Adam

You have to care for sure. Care enough to learn all you can about healing from tms for sure. Then when you learn all you can and you totally understand the tms how to, then you can relax and let the healing finish because you know the truth and the truth sets you free. See I believe most are healed the very day the finally get it, the very day they finally understand ya know. Then you can relax and just let it finish its course -- no problem.

Do folks heal in 6 weeks, of course. Thats the reconditioning phase but they still have muscle atrophy that they have to renew and many other factors. To get back to the point -- I know I was better in 6 weeks cause I understood all the concepts after 6 weeks but it still took me almost a year to totally re-condition.

I lost the pain about 90 days in. I got the understanding about 6 weeks in. See I was healed the day I understood. Like the guy with the broken leg, he knows hes going to heal, he doesn't study it much cause he knows he will heal but remember he knows the rules to that leg. I'm tms healing knowledge you have to know all the tools so you can start to understand all you need to know so you too can become pain free in a short time. Although again as mentioned above, if you focus on the time -- it will just slow ya down.

Even after you have become pain free and your healed, you will still have conditionings that will have to be eliminated in time if you want the full effect. Hope this helps. Bless you

 

[Richsimm22]

I'm still amazed at the overwhelming support that is available on this site and all without having to spend a single penny. Ive had more support on here in 4 weeks than ive had anywhere else in the whole 6 years I've had back pain. Every person on here all with different backgrounds and walks of life and different symptoms brought together with one common theme. We all have or used to have TMS.

 

[Mermaid]

I'm still amazed at the overwhelming support that is available on this site and all without having to spend a single penny. Ive had more support on here in 4 weeks than ive had anywhere else in the whole 6 years I've had back pain. Every person on here all with different backgrounds and walks of life and different symptoms brought together with one common theme. We all have or used to have TMS.

"Love conquers all.............even TMS"

 

[UkAdR]

Yb44 - thanks I have read Alan Gordon's post about outcome independence - I really like the Dead Poet's Society example. I think that is very similar to Forest in his video saying that when he stopped caring about his pain it started to dissipate.

Yoga Lady - I appreciate the situation you are in - it closely mirrors my own. I have been offered a spinal fusion at the moment for my L5-S1 disc. I am desperate to avoid this as I have read so much about people not really getting much better after the surgery. It seems so invasive. My orthopaedic surgeon has only given an 80% chance of feeling better, and I'm not too keen on that statistic! I am for sure going to give TMS healing a very significant change of working before I even consider it as there seem to be no negatives or side effects from trying it!

Herbie - I have to say its very reassuring that it took 90 days to lose your pain! Not great for you and I wish it would have been faster for you, but it's good to hear its not as fast as I was originally hoping.

And yes Rich - I completely agree. Having this pain has felt extremely lonely at times. People say they understand but I think unless you have experienced what it's like to have this kind of pain 24 hours a day its almost impossible to empathise. I have also tried a couple of other forums before - in particular spine-health. While there are some stories on there that have hope, there is so much negativity that's its impossible not to get more and more despondent and depressed about your situation. Here is different. It isn't lonely. It feels like everyone understands, and people taking the time to reply to posts means more to me, and I'm sure to others like Rich, than a simple thank you in a post like this can express.

Perhaps the English colloquialism will be better - Cheers everyone

 

[Richsimm22]

Im so glad I started the forum now because at first I didnt want to and the only reason was because I hate social networking sites. I deactivated my Facebook account over a year ago and I don't regret it one bit. Its nice to keep in touch with people but I dont think facebook is a good thing and its full of negativity and propaganda and it seems to make people think in a certain way that's not healthy and certainly could cause alot of tms related emotions (jealously, rage, fear, anger).

This forum is completely the opposite. Its warm, friendly and healthy and im privileged to be a member.