Day 1 Weightlifter with PTSD had a bad Tuesday

[Quadzilla]

Hello! I have decided to give this a shot after 4 different people said variations of, "There's this book about back pain being emotional by John something or other."

I am a powerlifter and olympic lifter. I am a wife and I am a mother of a 7 year old. I got into shape after back problems in my twenties and I hadn't had a problem since. But I have had a tough year. I was the victim of a violent crime in January and I am dealing with that trauma and I have had a number of problems in my personal relationships. Two weeks ago Tuesday I had all my pain, rage, shame, and anger buttons pushed in a horrendous conversation and I swallowed it. Within an hour I had the beginning of sciatica.

I am nervous to stop PT and acupuncture all together. I see an acupuncturist regularly to help manage my stress. I have some PTSD symptoms and a lot on my plate. Emotionally speaking, this has been a terrible year. But I am going to give this a shot because I notice that every time I start to release the muscles that give me pain, I cry about very my Tuesday incident.

I have been saying all along that the pain is real but the cause is emotional. I do find that acupuncture and massage allow me the space to tap into those feelings and cry. I need to do a lot of crying.

I will attempt to resume normal activities tomorrow. Not the weightlifting. But the living.

 

[Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)]

Hi, Quadzilla. I laugh at your web name.

Well, it sure sounds to me that your pains are from TMS. Even four people have told you about Dr. Sarno
and his philosophy that repressed emotions are the cause of physical pain. You have had a stressful year and
it's no wonder you are feeling physical pain.

I'm reluctant to suggest you stop the acupuncture or massage because you feel they are helping you, although I gave up
acupuncture after about two years because it seemed like the treatments would go on forever. I didn't know
about TMS back then or I would have stopped a lot earlier.

I think you don't need the acupuncture and instead work on TMS techniques to heal. A good way to start is to
read Dr. Sarno's book, Healing Back Pain, which applies to all kinds of pain that are from repressed emotions and/or
our perfectionist personalities.

Massage can be restful and help with pain, and you could continue with that, but don't think your pains will go away
because of massage. They will go away by dealing with your anger and repressed emotions.

You say you were the victim of a violent crime in January and that alone would give you TMS if you haven't been able
to deal with that trauma successfully. If you retain anger and repress that, it could cause pain. And you are having
personal relationship problems, too, which can cause physical pain. Being a wife and having a 7-year-old daughter can
have its stresses as well.

I am not a doctor but someone who recovered from severe back pain after learning about TMS, reading Dr. Sarno's book,
also one by Steve Ozanich called The Great Pain Deception, and writing one with another TMS recoverer, Herbie,
called God Does Not Want You to Be in Pain, in which we add the faith or spiritual element in healing, but it can be
read with or without applying that.

Also I am glad you have begun the SEP program because it is a great way to learn how to heal from TMS pain.
I found journaling very helpful by discovering boyhood traumas and dealing with them.

This forum is where you will share your story and get replies from others who have either become free of pain
because of TMS work or are still working on it. We are all here to help each other and hope you will keep in touch
about your progress in the SEP. I healed from back pain and you can heal from your pains, too. It just takes some
time and mental effort.

It's very important to practice deep breathing and think calm thoughts. Be positive that you will heal and you will.

 

[Quadzilla]

Thank you for your encouraging response Walt.

I have reached out to my practitioners as well as my coach to let them know that although I acknowledge that the nerve compression is real, I know they come from suppressed emotions. I would like to work with them with that in mind. Acupuncture has been a great spiritual tool for me - moreso than helping with aches and pains. And massage is an opportunity to relax and give me the mental space to think about my feelings.

I am also in talk therapy. My therapist was one of the four people to suggest Sarno's book. So I told her I am on board and let her know I would like this to be my primary focus.

I know I will heal and I am excited to address these suppressed feelings once and for all!

 

[Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)]

Hi again, Quadzilla. Then keep on with both acupuncture and massage and the talk therapy.
You are going in positive directions.

Don't forget deep breathing to calm yourself, and live in the present, not worrying about the future.

 

[Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)]

Also, I found some really great free videos on YouTube for relaxation and falling to sleep.
They are self-hypnosis videos that are all pretty much the same, so I pick ones with the most
hypnotic and soothing images and voices. They all incorporate many TMS healing, calming techniques
such as deep breathing and imaging... picturing ourselves in a calm, warm, safe place and listening
to the peaceful sounds and nice aromas.
You might give them a try. I find them to be very relaxing.

 

[Quadzilla]

Sounds good. I saw a sleep one you posted in the forum in response to someone else. I used it and it was helpful. I feel overwhelmed searching for them but if you have 1 or 2 to share I would love that!

 

[Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)]

My favorite is by Meg Tocantins:, but I couldn't copy the url.
You can find it at YouTube called FALL ASLEEP FAST which may be the first one.

 

[Quadzilla]

Thanks!

 

[Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)]

It's also good to get everything ready to go to bed before watching the sleep video.
Maybe even have a cup of hot tea or milk before, during, or after viewing.