Waking up with back pain

N

njacob

New Member
Hi.
This is my first time participating in this forum. I was hoping someone could share if they have had a similar experience as me. I have had chronic lower back pain for the last 3 years. I've had MRI's, CT Scans, PT, acupuncture, injections, chiropractor, etc... per Dr Sarno's theory, the things that were found should not cause pain and are very normal for my age 55.

I am completely convinced I have TMS and believe it is the cause of my pain. After reading his book my pain went away completely for more than a week. I could see myself and relate to every page. The pain has come back but now it is only in the morning when I get out of bed - though not as bad. Soon after waking up and moving around I am pain free for the rest of the day. I am exercising more intensely now, though not running yet.

This is now my consistent state. I wonder if I am having anxiety or harboring emotions when I'm sleeping? Has anyone had a similar experience and how have you overcome this? If I could find a solution to my morning wake up pain I would be 100% pain free! I appreciate any thoughts.
Thanks!
 
njacob said:
After reading his book my pain went away completely for more than a week.
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njacob said:
The pain has come back but now it is only in the morning when I get out of bed - though not as bad.
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A Lot of us have had spectacular healings like the one you describe but then find out our body either allows it back, or it moves, or it changes in perception.

Since we're not hanging out with you and don't know your personal life, e.g. relationships, work, childhood, it's impossible for us to tell why, BUT there seems to only be a couple of recurring factors and they were all in the book.... Conditioning and/or new or reawakened unconscious anger...and maybe Fear.

The best way to find that out? Paper and pen and Making lists about yourself. Anger inducers...ones that you remember from childhood, all the way up to today. I am 59, but there is stuff that happened while I was developing at age 6 and 7 that still bugs me to think about or remember. I also have new pressures that are colored by those old experiences and fears. Usually when I become aware of that, the symptom just goes away.
Then sometimes I just have to wake up to my fear and how I might have conditioned myself to experience something at a certain time of the day. Hey..my kids make fun of what a stiff old man I am, but i don't have Pain!

You don't have to spend the rest of your life on a Shrinks couch but you might need to go a little deeper than just a read through.
Anytime I have a 'new' or 'returned' symptom, I get out the book that I have owned since '99 and the other i have owned since the mid 2000's and I 'start over'.
It's usually something hiding in plain sight.
 
Baseball65 said:
A Lot of us have had spectacular healings like the one you describe but then find out our body either allows it back, or it moves, or it changes in perception.

Since we're not hanging out with you and don't know your personal life, e.g. relationships, work, childhood, it's impossible for us to tell why, BUT there seems to only be a couple of recurring factors and they were all in the book.... Conditioning and/or new or reawakened unconscious anger...and maybe Fear.

The best way to find that out? Paper and pen and Making lists about yourself. Anger inducers...ones that you remember from childhood, all the way up to today. I am 59, but there is stuff that happened while I was developing at age 6 and 7 that still bugs me to think about or remember. I also have new pressures that are colored by those old experiences and fears. Usually when I become aware of that, the symptom just goes away.
Then sometimes I just have to wake up to my fear and how I might have conditioned myself to experience something at a certain time of the day. Hey..my kids make fun of what a stiff old man I am, but i don't have Pain!

You don't have to spend the rest of your life on a Shrinks couch but you might need to go a little deeper than just a read through.
Anytime I have a 'new' or 'returned' symptom, I get out the book that I have owned since '99 and the other i have owned since the mid 2000's and I 'start over'.
It's usually something hiding in plain sight.
Click to expand...

Thank you so much! I've been rereading his Healing Back Pain book again which definitely helps and also journaling. You mentioned conditioning and I think that makes a lot of sense. I have trained myself that the first thing to come to mind when I wake up, even in the middle of the night is "does my back hurt?" Literally it's the first thing and I am having trouble removing that first thought of the day. I'll have to make sure I focus on that part of the book. Thanks again for your thoughts. So helpful!
 
njacob said:
I have trained myself that the first thing to come to mind when I wake up, even in the middle of the night is "does my back hurt?" Literally it's the first thing and I am having trouble removing that first thought of the day.
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That is a sure sign of it being TMS. I have done just that with a number of symptoms.
I have had real injuries, but I never thought of them first thing when I wake up or last thing before I go to bed...no obsession. Drs told me it would heal in X amount of weeks and I believed them. But we, people with TMS always want to know...."Is it healed? Am I better? I understood this last week and I'm not better...maybe I really DID mess it up?"

There is a weird sentence in the middle of page 37 that I never understood until I'd read it for 15 years?

It goes "With this repertoire of personality traits, It was not difficult to postulate anxiety was responsible for TMS since such an individual would be anxious about how things would turn out"

My thought was "How what would turn out?" "Did I miss something?"

He's talking about this obsessional component...he's just talking about it as a Doctor commenting on the sufferer (us)

The weird part is, I don't know how to stop that. I can stop an OCD episode, but that 'first thing in the morning' always catches me off-guard..I'm not even all the way awake.
The only thing I do know is every time I return to reading and Scribbling, I eventually get up one day, start doing stuff and am distracted and then.... "Hey...it's Gone!"
And I'm sure it will work for you too.
 
Being distracted and super busy is the best as you aren't focusing on it. In these moments when I realize I'm feeling great I quickly tell myself "don't think about it!" and just keep moving along with things - I guess I get a flash of fear that thinking about it will bring the pain back. I'm hopeful that I am able retrain myself to start my mornings out without thinking first of the pain. I started reading the threads about conditioning. Thanks so much for the tip!
 
Great discussion and advice from @Baseball65, as always!

@njacob, if you are interested in a structured program to guide you with journaling topics and techniques, we've got the free Structured Educational Program on the main TMSWiki.org. Totally free and no registration required.

Thanks to good luck and Dr Sarno, I had a decent and quick recovery back in 2011 from a number of symptoms, but it was finding this forum and the exercises in the SEP which gave me the tools to recover further. As the years went by, aging advanced, and the stresses of the modern world became more challenging, those tools are even more important to be able to go back to as needed (and they are needed!)

You've made an excellent start - welcome!
 
JanAtheCPA said:
Great discussion and advice from @Baseball65, as always!

@njacob, if you are interested in a structured program to guide you with journaling topics and techniques, we've got the free Structured Educational Program on the main TMSWiki.org. Totally free and no registration required.

Thanks to good luck and Dr Sarno, I had a decent and quick recovery back in 2011 from a number of symptoms, but it was finding this forum and the exercises in the SEP which gave me the tools to recover further. As the years went by, aging advanced, and the stresses of the modern world became more challenging, those tools are even more important to be able to go back to as needed (and they are needed!)

You've made an excellent start - welcome!
Click to expand...

Hi.
I have been doing the SEP and it's been terrific! I love reading through the forum as well. It's very helpful to read what others are experiencing and how they are managing their TMS. I've been making sure I am journaling which I have never done before. It's proving to be a thought provoking way to figure out the things that could be triggers/causing of my TMS.
Thanks so much for the support!
 
Diana-M said:
But what exactly do you read and scribble?
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I generally use the 4h step from the twelve steps. That is
"Made a searching and Fearless Moral inventory of ourselves".

That is a four 'Column' Inventory of People, Places and Institutions and Idea's with which we are angry.

1. First, you just make a list. I don't think about it. I just write. If I can think about anybody and have a gripe, they belong on the list.
Places...places I feel I am not welcome, or whose mere existence pisses me off.
Idea's, and institution's government waste? foolish Movements and causes? Overbearing? Negligent?
All of them go on there.

2. What they did to me. Why am I angry at them? Why do they keep bugging even though I have done everything I can to fix the relationship?

3. What does that effect in me?
-Personal relationships
-sex relationships (partners)
-security
-Money
- Pride
-ambition
-self esteem

THIS is what's causing the TMS and the Rage. For the purpose of TMS, you need not get past there....and while you're writing, LET IT FLY. Get good and pissed as you review it. Sometimes I get so angry I have to stop and ask God for an extension...it can be really disturbing and that's why most people balk at it.

Then, The part Alcoholics have to do, but TMS sufferers might not and I encourage them to 'sit on it' until their symptoms leave:

Where were we at fault?
Where were we selfish?
Where were we to blame?


I think it bears mentioning, I did this regularly Before I got TMS...and had STOPPED doing it because I thought I was 'fixed' and no longer needed to write them. One of my main recovery tools, was those Inventory's...but now I was a NICE Middle class Dad and company worker. I was no longer a depraved drunk so I don't need to do that...


OUCH, my backs killing me!!


so..That's a good place to start. There are a million downloadable '4th step worksheets' online, but I don't write that small and some of it isn't as thorough as if you were scribbling in your own folder.

The Schubiner workbook I am going through is very similar, except so far it only focuses on the past...a lot of my resentments are current. maybe if I go farther in I'll find it is comprehensive.

Sorry for the book, but if your like me, I like really specific instructions
 
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