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Day 1 Starting the journey

cbecker79

Newcomer
Hi all. Beginning the SEP to free myself of the pain I've been living with since October 2017. 39 year old husband, father of 5 and business owner. I started encountering persistent/chronic pelvic pain that has made life miserable at best. Lost my joy, scared to sit, use the bathroom and do physical activity. Have gone from going to the gym 4-5 times a week, skiing in the winter and riding my bike and hiking in the summer to barely getting through work and coming home and lying around and drinking too much to dull the pain. Have gone through the whole pelvic floor physical therapy program, which helped some, but after a year plateaued. After hearing of TMS a few times it finally caught my attention and I'm in. I am an obsessive, anxious, nervous, wanting to please individual with perfectionist type tendencies. I keep things bottled up and I'm always the "strong" one who never has anything wrong and has "all the answers". I know I'm on the right path and have hope for the first time in many months.
 
Welcome to the SEP, cbecker79, and the Forum,

It seems you see the patterns which create TMS in you, and the chronic nature of the pain. I'm glad you found Dr. Sarno's work, and are taking it seriously. For most, this is the hardest part, to "accept the diagnosis."

Have gone through the whole pelvic floor physical therapy program, which helped some, but after a year plateaued.

This, if looked at within a TMS framework might have the pain relief from less fear about movement, feeling you were getting better, being reassured.

I am an obsessive, anxious, nervous, wanting to please individual with perfectionist type tendencies. I keep things bottled up and I'm always the "strong" one who never has anything wrong and has "all the answers".

How important to us these things are! They persist because these things make us safe, loved, "worthy." Your awareness of these things will get you through. Hold yourself with kindness.

I know I'm on the right path and have hope for the first time in many months.

You are right to have hope. Just remember to be patient, persistent, and know that progress is not usually linear. It is usually more of a three steps forward, one step back. Learning to not fear as much ---either symptoms or your mind will become part of the practice.

Andy B
 
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