Day 9 Self critical

[MSZ812]

I feel that I am extremely self critical. Negative thoughts are constantly running through my mind. "I hate where I'm at in life", "why don't I make as much money as him?", "why would anyone want to be with me?", "I am a failure". I would never say those things to a loved one. So why say them to myself? Those thoughts are rarely, if ever, helpful to me. They don't inspire me to change myself or my circumstances. They just result in more self criticism. I remember watching a movie a couple years ago. In a scene, one sibling says something mean to the other. The parent makes the child say 3 things they like about their sibling as punishment for the mean comment. It's a simple idea, but I think one that is helpful for self criticism. Even if we "meant" that negative thought, there are things about ourselves that we do like, that unfortunately don't often reach our conscious mind.

I am a great friend
I am a generous person
I am smart

-Matt

 

[Ellen]

Makes me think of the book/movie "the Help", where the nanny says to the child every day--"You are smart. You are kind. You are important."

 

[Jojo61]

Hi Matt,

I know exactly what you mean. It's so hard to stop the critiziging voice in our heads. Great tip about listing 3 things you like about yourself. I'll give it a try.

I am creative
I am a dedicated wife
I'm a good cook

 

[Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)]

I especially like the good cook affirmation. Being a dedicated, creative good cook is better yet!

A sure-fire way to make everyone happy and reap praise to make you feel liked and build your self-esteem.