RSI and wrist pain

[thore3004]

Hi, my name is Thore, I am 21 years old and coming from Germany. I'm struggling with pain in my wrists and lower arms for one and a half year now. I'm calling myself a perfectionist who always tends to worry that everything he does won't ever be good enough to succeed in life. This leads to me pressuring myself at every occasion.
I love drawing, playing video games and doing all kinds of game development stuff. I study media informatics, which means that I have to spend much time in front of my computer. It has become my passion since I started doing it. But after my first few semesters and exams I started experiencing this pain. It never really stopped me from working and doing what I love but I am afraid that this can happen in the future. When I went to the doctor he diagnosed that my issue was tendonitis. However the pain didn't go away after doing stretches and all kinds of stuff that should help me getting better. After another visit the doctor called it RSI syndrome while telling me that I'll have to live with it and manage it to not make it worse.
In the last few months I started learning about the TMS approach, doing a lot of research and watching peoples success stories. I also started doing meditation 2 times a day. But allthough all of this seems very plausible to me I'm still struggling to stop having fear thinking about my future life. My biggest concern is that I'll never be able to do the things I love in the future.
I really want to believe the TMS approach and I'm already trying to change my mindset by handling my emotions better. I think what's holding me back is that no one has ever clearly told me that it's likely for me to have TMS. It seems so difficult to just ignore all the pain because it feels so real physically. It just doesn't feel right because all I'm thinking is that I'll damage myself doing this.
What do you think about my story? Is there someone experiencing the same issues that I have? Does it seem likely for me to have TMS? How can I manage my fears?

Thanks in advance!
Thore

 

[Baseball65]

I'll have to live with it and manage it to not make it worse.

Straight up BULLshit! I want to slap the Dr. who told you that.
That's what they told me about my back when I was 32... "If I ever even jogged again, I risked paralysis",,,, been running painfree for two decades since then, after reading Sarno.

But allthough all of this seems very plausible to me I'm still struggling to stop having fear thinking about my future life. My biggest concern is that I'll never be able to do the things I love in the future.

the fear of not being able to do stuff is what keeps us in pain that tells us we won't be able to do stuff. We are all afraid at some level when the future is pondered, so leave it be for a moment

I really want to believe the TMS approach and I'm already trying to change my mindset by handling my emotions better.

We don't handle them better...we just become more and more aware of how most of them are automatically hidden. Conscious and perceived emotions are like the tip of an iceberg... whatever you're aware of is a small fraction. That is humbling.

I think what's holding me back is that no one has ever clearly told me that it's likely for me to have TMS

Me either... but I am as smart as most of the robots who treated me.... and smarter than some. God didn't give you the ability to reason for nothing. Read the literature and decide. That's it. Very few of us have been to a 'TMS doctor'

I'm thinking is that I'll damage myself doing this.

You won't. That's the fear talking and all of us have been through that portion of recovery... that's all the scare that the medical world likes to give out . It's their scared little Cat having kittens in your head.... show her to the door

How can I manage my fears?

By acknowledging they are there. Awareness is the key. Courage doesn't mean not being scared. It means being scared and going ahead and doing it anyways.. If I wasn't scared, what would I need courage for?

Talk to yourself. YOU are your greatest advocate.... you do have a choice and a voice in the matter

peace

 

[Miriam G. Bongiovanni]

Hey thore3004,

Your story sounds very much like that of a typical TMS sufferer. Unfortunately, you might never get a diagnosis from a doctor, unless there is one who believes in TMS in your area (I never did, and like you, I was told to live with my arm pain and never ever do sports again - so glad I didn't give up!).

To me, it sounds like your fear of the future is what's holding you back, as well as your fear of 'damaging' your wrist. As long as you hold these fears, the pain will unfortunately persist. With TMS, you can't just do 'half' the work (I see you are meditating which is great), but you've got to TOTALLY commit and believe in the diagnosis. As you work through things, you'll discover more and more things about yourself and your condition that will prove that it's TMS, and it will become much easier to believe in the diagnosis. Also, it sounds like you need to start dealing with your fear and trepidation ASAP. Try catching your negative thoughts around pain as soon as you get them, and don't let them take you to an unpleasant future. When you are in pain, observe it as if you're curious about it, and try and replace your fear with a more neutral emotion (body scan meditations can help with this).

I recommend starting with the free Structured Program on the TMS Wiki and doing all the tasks there. On my site painoutsidethebox.com, I've also got some free resources on TMS and the different obstacles it presents for us. Good luck!

Miriam

TMS Coach & MindBody Practitioner

 

[thore3004]

Hey thore3004,

Your story sounds very much like that of a typical TMS sufferer. Unfortunately, you might never get a diagnosis from a doctor, unless there is one who believes in TMS in your area (I never did, and like you, I was told to live with my arm pain and never ever do sports again - so glad I didn't give up!).

To me, it sounds like your fear of the future is what's holding you back, as well as your fear of 'damaging' your wrist. As long as you hold these fears, the pain will unfortunately persist. With TMS, you can't just do 'half' the work (I see you are meditating which is great), but you've got to TOTALLY commit and believe in the diagnosis. As you work through things, you'll discover more and more things about yourself and your condition that will prove that it's TMS, and it will become much easier to believe in the diagnosis. Also, it sounds like you need to start dealing with your fear and trepidation ASAP. Try catching your negative thoughts around pain as soon as you get them, and don't let them take you to an unpleasant future. When you are in pain, observe it as if you're curious about it, and try and replace your fear with a more neutral emotion (body scan meditations can help with this).

I recommend starting with the free Structured Program on the TMS Wiki and doing all the tasks there. On my site painoutsidethebox.com, I've also got some free resources on TMS and the different obstacles it presents for us. Good luck!

Miriam

TMS Coach & MindBody Practitioner

Thanks for the reply!
Not being officially diagnosed is actually not a problem for me. It would be great of course, but interacting with someone who knows something about TMS is helping me a lot. That's why I decided to write a post on this forum. I told people around me about TMS, but most of them, and especially my family, don't believe in it and tell me it's not a real thing. To be honest I didn't believe in it too, but that has changed by now. But still, it's hard to trust something everyone else rejects and that's why I might have not been convinced by 100 per cent.
Anyways, it feels good to read that I am probably on the right way after trying so many things that didn't work out. Managing those fears seems very difficult to me but I am ready to walk that path using your advice. Under no circumstances will I give up.

 

[Miriam G. Bongiovanni]

Hey thore,

One thing I always suggest to my clients when it comes to TMS is to not speak about it with family and friends, or even to doctors who've got no idea what it is, because most will reject it and instil new doubts in your mind, something which can keep you stuck. I also suggest not talking too much about your pain to others who are not into TMS - in a way, talking about our pain and getting other's sympathy and compassion is a way of keeping the pain alive (as it's actually giving it a purpose - that of helping you connect with other people).

It's great that you found this forum. I really recommend the free Structured Education Program - it's what I did to get better, and it worked (but I stuck to it right through the end and stayed focused). By the end of it, I was laughing at my pain, making fun of it, and because my reactions and expectations had totally changed, the pain went away, because it no longer served a purpose. It does sound too good to be true at times, but the TMS approach does work wonders!

Best of luck & stay safe!

Miriam

 

[thore3004]

Hey thore,

One thing I always suggest to my clients when it comes to TMS is to not speak about it with family and friends, or even to doctors who've got no idea what it is, because most will reject it and instil new doubts in your mind, something which can keep you stuck. I also suggest not talking too much about your pain to others who are not into TMS - in a way, talking about our pain and getting other's sympathy and compassion is a way of keeping the pain alive (as it's actually giving it a purpose - that of helping you connect with other people).

It's great that you found this forum. I really recommend the free Structured Education Program - it's what I did to get better, and it worked (but I stuck to it right through the end and stayed focused). By the end of it, I was laughing at my pain, making fun of it, and because my reactions and expectations had totally changed, the pain went away, because it no longer served a purpose. It does sound too good to be true at times, but the TMS approach does work wonders!

Best of luck & stay safe!

Miriam

Hey Miriam,

I already started the Structured Education Program today. I really suprised myself when writing about the 'question to ponder'. Alltough the first question seems so simple I wrote a whole page about my thoughts. For me a life without TMS means not having those fears anymore. I think that's actually what bothers me the most, not the symptoms. I discovered, that in my case the goal is also the path. It's obvious, but I never really came to that conclusion. After completing day 1 I also felt a little bit of relief. I think the program will really help me to keep doing TMS related stuff. It's like an everyday task or a reminder to do myself good.

Again, thanks for your advice! I really appreciate it. Not talking too much about it seems like a good idea.

Thore