Recovery from 28 years of multiple chronic conditions

Hello everyone, this will probably be my only post here. I've been meaning post my story on this forum for a while now so finally decided to get it done!

Where to start?

Spoiler: Backstory and references to suicide

Well when I was 18 I got a job doing night work. Not long after starting I developed bladder urgency issues. I would desperately feel like I needed to wee but when I did it still felt like I needed to go. This lead to me obsessing over it, I would try to squeeze every last drop and relieve myself when my bladder had hardly anything in it, this just made it much worse. I gave up the night work and it went away for a short period of time but then it came back. It was a living hell, the doctors couldn't find anything and all I could do was try to distract myself. This went on for about 7 years until I finally started to work on retraining my bladder and that helped gradually.

Not soon after I had started to get to grips with my bladder I pulled something in my lower back. I then started to develop back pain that turned into a chronic condition. I was fine standing and walking. It was only really sitting down that it got so bad. I was convinced it was postural. I used to go out running and that seemed to help.

A long while later ( I am about 38 at this point) I took on a new job, it was working in a warehouse and doing a bit of lifting (nothing too heavy) and my back pain really started to kick off and on top of that my bladder urgency issues returned siginificantly too. The doctors just kept sending me away but I was in hell again and wanted to die. I then began developing knee pain, this made everything 100% worse. No longer could I walk or stand to relieve my back pain. I was trapped, I couldn't work, felt useless, in pain all the time and miserable. This would last for about 8 years and on top of that toward the end I developed debilitating foot pain.

The foot pain was the final nail in the coffin. It was so bad I could barely walk or stand. I couldn't even sit properly, just placing my feet on the floor in a sitting position resulted in extreme pain, and I couldn't sit with my feet up due to my back pain. I was reduced to lieing on the floor all day in distress. That was when I tried to take my own life. After several failed attempts I contacted my doctor and went to a menetal ward for a few days. A Doctor I met on the first night floated the notion my pain could be psychological, I was kind of open to that suggestion but I never saw him again. Once I got out I was just planning again and searching for suicide methods while still trying to get better (as I promised my family) Then I recieved a miracle

I had an appointment about my foot pain, the specialist was very nice. She talked to me a little about pain and trying to push myself a little bit. She also mentioned that I try body scan meditation. I took her advice and tried, it seemed to help a little. Then while scrolling through the comments of a body scan video I saw one name mentioned (Dr Sarno) I had no idea who this guy was but I was desperate and wanted to try anything. I did a youtube search and the first thing I saw was a Dan Buglio video on the 12 daily reminders. I kind of skimmed over that but I think some of it went in. Then I found this video by POW music with this guy talking about his success with TMS. He was cycling through a park and I just listened to him talk. He seemed so honest and he wasn't talking about managing pain he was talking about curing it.

This was it, everything seemed to fit, I was in. Next thing I did was find a copy of Healing Back Pain. I just lay in bed listening to it a little at a time. It was amazing, everything Dr Sarno was saying made sense and I started connecting all my pain to my emotions. One big connection I made was how my back pain would only severely trigger in situations where I was suffering huge anxiety over my bladder and if I had access to a toilet.

After that I just worked and worked and worked. I would watch endless videos on TMS and the Mind Body connection. Everyday I would try to unlearn my pain. I would force myself to do things I never imagined I could do. It took a while but gradually I started getting better, the results were amazing. In 2 months I went from hardly being able to walk to running 3km or more. In 3 months I could sit or stand as much as I wanted.

Now it's about 6 Months since I discovered Dr Sarno and I've pretty much made a complete recovery. Im 46 years old now and my life has been laid to waste but I'm here and I'm alive. I have a paid job and I volunteer, I socialize and do pretty much whatever I want to do. More than that I've been opened up to the world of TMS and found so many people just like me, where before I was lost and alone. I often just stop and laugh at the way I used to be, all the things I thought I couldn't do all the pain and misery I went through.

I still get attacks and pain in places but it just doesn't bother me anymore. I understand what is going on and for the most part I feel safe. It may have taken a long time but eventually I got here.

 

Thank you for your testimony! I am 48 and I too have been plagued by health issues all my life. I never tried to take my own life but I have thought about tons in the last 14 years. TMS work did not cure me like I was hoping it would but I still believe in it more than in any other treatment method for chronic conditions. Some of the stories, including yours, are amazing. I wish you continued health and faith ❤️, and thank you for sharing your positive story to inspire others who are still in the pain rut.