Day 10 Progress so far and sharing emotions

For me, it's the journaling. That is what's opening my eyes and making the difference! I love to learn and prefer to intellectualize my problems instead of getting into the nitty gritty to actually fix them. That's why I think the journaling is making the most difference - it's forcing me to get in there and do the work. It feels like this hard shell I've kept myself wrapped in is cracking wide open and there are real glimmers of relief - of both physical and emotional pain. I know I'm just at the very beginning and - not gonna lie - I'm a little afraid of what's ahead (emotionally) as things get deeper, but I'm in!

Sharing emotions -- today's question brought me to my knees. I've learned the hard way, and for reasons I'm not quite ready to share with a thousand people I've only known for a week (LOL) that it isn't emotionally safe to share my emotions with my spouse. It makes me think of that phrase "an inconvenient truth." Unfortunately, though, that's what it is. Inconvenient. Fortunately, I have a VERY strong support system that includes professional counseling and very trusted friends and family members. So, I don't feel alone in any of this, but rather incredibly disappointed not to be able to share with the one person I'd very much like to share with. I'm not sure where all of this will lead, but I'm okay with taking the process slow and working on myself. The biggest "aha" moment has been connecting this "inconvenient truth" to my physical pain. You would THINK I'd have connected those dots a long time ago. I'm guessing my inner self has known all along, but it certainly took a while for this knowledge to bubble up to my consciousness. Everything is starting to make so much more sense, and for that I'm grateful!