Day 3 My "Hard Flaccid" Syndrome Has Made me in to a Recluse

My issue, a derivative of Chronic Pelvic Pain Syndrome, is 'hard flaccid', a state wherein the penis and scrotum remains retracted and firm to the touch during a flaccid / non-erect state. It is a classic form of TMS when it effects the penis (mild oxygen deprivation causes the tissues to remain firm / tight and retracted). My initial post is found here: http://www.tmswiki.org/forum/threads/my-battle-with-hard-flaccid-syndrome-a-k-a-cpps.18623/ (My Battle with "Hard Flaccid" Syndrome (a.k.a. "CPPS"))

The question to ponder for today's program revolved around exercise. I realized one major reason I don't go to the gym as frequently as I should is because of my hard flaccid condition. Heavy weightlifting seems to make the pain and tightness worse (probably a conditioned response). But also, generally speaking, the gym is full of people, and my situation is very embarrassing. I realized I avoid social situations because I am constantly afraid people will see my hard flaccid through my clothing and judge me for it. Women will think I am not manly enough and other men will not take me as seriously. My penis and scrotum look very small due to my syndrome and it causes a lot of fear and reclusion. For some reason my testosterone levels have also plummeted and are at the levels of a 75 year old. I plan on restarting Testosterone Replacement Therapy as soon as I get a job (currently unemployed -- a current stressor).

Before hard flaccid I was very well endowed in both flaccid and erect states and I took a lot of pride in my physique. But now the tables have turned and it has been a huge blow to my ego. Fear is very much a dominating presence for me especially when wearing tighter clothing, which is why I wear baggy, loose clothing now. Cialis and other PDE-5i's temporarily increase bloodflow to the region and help regain some size (less tightness) and help a bit with the pain as a result which is why I have used them as a crutch. But Dr. Sarno has advised to remove all coping mechanisms to tackle the issue head on, psychologically, which is what I am now doing.