Increase in Symptoms

[Alouqua47]

Increase in Symptoms
When this started, I already had several symptoms: in my calves, in my arms, and sometimes a random symptom that would change from time to time. It could be a burning sensation or some kind of discomfort, but it would come and go in phases.
I had improved in my legs. I went from not being able to walk to walking normally, with only a slight sensation in my calves, even without really understanding the theory I know now.
Currently, for the past two months, my response to the symptoms has been better. Even when the intensity is strong —which is most of the time— I try not to focus on it. I walk a lot, read a lot, shift my attention, and I try not to react with fear. I use my arms more and move them often; not as much as I would like, but I’m no longer afraid to move them like before.
So I don’t understand: why, if before I had more fear, even panic attacks, I only had those symptoms, and now my brain has not only created new ones in my thighs —where I had never had anything— but has also extended what I had in my arms to my shoulder and sometimes to nearby areas?
I won’t deny that I’ve started to think that maybe I’m not doing this correctly. Maybe my brain still detects some fear, but even so, it doesn’t make sense. Why, if my response is better and my fear is lower, is this happening?
Maybe it’s part of the process. I just wanted to know if anyone has experienced something similar, especially at the beginning of recovery. I would really like to hear your experiences.
Is it normal that instead of decreasing, symptoms increase or spread more than what you had at the beginning?

 

[Rabscuttle]

• Wow Alouqua, that’s a pretty incredible Improvement from where you were a few weeks ago! I hope you are taking time to honor yourself.

don’t worry about the symptoms, this is part of the process, first the mindset changes then you start to see results. It’s going to take so,e time to fully get out of fight or flight and for the brain to understand these symptoms aren’t serving a purpose.

it’s important not to view things in short time scales. This stuff takes time. For many we’re undoing years, maybe decades of dysfunctional living, that’s not getting resolved in a few weeks, sorry to say.

I have days where my symptoms are increased and widespread, but I also have really significant moments with minimal pain, unthinkable a few months ago. I was at work today speaking freely, and realize holy shit I have no pain anywhere. It was something. It didn’t last more than a few minutes, but wow lol. Trends are more important than how you feel on short time scales. It took 1.25 years to reach this point, a big mistake of mine was focusing on pressure and timelines. Give it some time and reevaluate.

 

[Alouqua47]

Thank you for responding. To be honest, I just wanted to vent a little. I truly thought my legs were improving. And now, having a new symptom in my thighs, which also seems to be spreading, makes me feel like I’ve gone backwards. On top of that, these symptoms are painful. I know it’s been a very short time. Sometimes I’m afraid that my brain will notice how much I want my arms to improve quickly, because coping with day-to-day life is very difficult. And now, with the difficulty in my legs, even more so.


[CITA="Rabscuttle, publicación: 171378, miembro: 23886"]

• ¡Guau, Alouqua, has mejorado muchísimo desde hace unas semanas! Espero que te estés tomando un tiempo para cuidarte.

No te preocupes por los síntomas, son parte del proceso. Primero cambia la mentalidad y luego empiezas a ver resultados. Llevará tiempo salir completamente de la respuesta de lucha o huida y que el cerebro entienda que estos síntomas no tienen ninguna utilidad.

Es importante no ver las cosas en términos de corto plazo. Esto lleva tiempo. Para muchos, estamos deshaciendo años, tal vez décadas de una vida disfuncional, y eso no se resolverá en unas pocas semanas, lamentablemente.

Hay días en que mis síntomas aumentan y se extienden, pero también tengo momentos realmente significativos con un dolor mínimo, impensable hace unos meses. Hoy estaba en el trabajo hablando con total libertad y me di cuenta de que, ¡madre mía!, no tenía dolor en ninguna parte. Fue algo increíble. No duró más de unos minutos, pero ¡guau! Las tendencias son más importantes que cómo te sientes a corto plazo. Me llevó 1,25 años llegar a este punto; un gran error mío fue centrarme en la presión y los plazos. Dale tiempo y reevalúa.

 

[Adam Coloretti (coach)]

I won’t deny that I’ve started to think that maybe I’m not doing this correctly. Maybe my brain still detects some fear, but even so, it doesn’t make sense. Why, if my response is better and my fear is lower, is this happening?

I think you're doing great! To me, I think this is why a hybrid model (both appreciating neuroscience and pain pathways but also the emotional aspect) is preferable. Neuroscience has come a long way, but the brain is the most complicated structure in the known universe. We don't know 1% about it. Things are bound not to make complete sense, as it often works in mysterious ways (although looking at your emotional world can help you to make more sense of things beyond the strict neuroscience, it adds to that understanding).

I definitely think it's part of the process (in fact, pretty much anything is possible with symptoms and the brain - so it's hard to say what is normal and what isn't when it comes to recovery). Hopefully what will happen is that as your attention comes off of your body and your fear lowers, conditioned responses will start to break up. What I mean by that is one day you'll do a movement and it will flare you, but the next day you'll do the same thing and it will be a lot less. What that does is it invites you to consider other factors, such as your emotional world. You may notice that on the day that it did flare you, you were very stressed about something else. That's not a coincidence. This then leads you to what to work on from an emotional point of view.

I do get the sense from what you're saying that you are still quite focused on the symptoms and monitoring them - but this seems to be improving. Onwards and upwards

 

[Alouqua47]

Thank you for your response. I have not ruled out the emotional work; however, to be honest, I’m not entirely sure what you mean exactly. I have recognized some aspects of my past that influenced certain behaviors and emotions that may have contributed to what I am experiencing now. Even so, I am aware of why I am like this: they were simply unfortunate events that happened one after another. I know that, for the most part, it was not my fault, although my emotions and ways of reacting might have been different. I don’t know if that would have changed the outcome.
As for my current emotions, I don’t think there is a significant problem. I do have to work on not falling into catastrophizing at times, but I have the support of my family and I don’t have any external pressures. Perhaps the only pressure is the one I place on myself to improve, and I know that can be counterproductive, so I try to regulate it. Sometimes I wonder if that is something my brain detects.
My emotional relationship with the symptoms has improved a lot compared to a few months ago. I can’t say that my fear is 100% gone, because that wouldn’t be realistic. I think anyone who has experienced something this intense frequently would understand that.
The biggest challenge is that my brain seems to have focused especially on my arms. That makes it very difficult to cope with. In addition, the sensations are very variable: sometimes it feels as if a nerve in my elbow were affected and the sensation radiates through my arm. It changes, moves, and appears without a clear pattern.
I cannot identify a specific trigger. It does not seem to be related to movement, since I can move my arms normally. In fact, I have lost much of my fear of doing so; before, I avoided it, and now I don’t. I move them with confidence, knowing that it does not necessarily trigger anything, and if it does, I try not to give it a catastrophic meaning.
At some point, there may have been more emotional triggers, such as fear of going out. I exposed myself to those fears, and it seems that my brain has started to understand, because going out is no longer necessarily associated with an increase in symptoms, although I can’t guarantee that it will never happen. I simply go out and accept whatever comes.
Right now, I feel that my work is mainly emotional. The way to convey safety to the brain is through experience: exposing myself to what used to cause fear and showing, on an emotional level, that there is no danger. I understand that if I don’t react with fear, the brain should gradually lose the need to generate these sensations.
Please tell me if you think I am mistaken about anything; I will take your advice. The brain is complex, but it is responsive to the signals we give it, so over time it should begin to question its prediction of danger and gradually let go.




[CITA="Adam Coloretti (entrenador), publicación: 171381, miembro: 24237"]¡Creo que lo estás haciendo genial! Para mí, creo que por eso es preferible un modelo híbrido (que valora tanto la neurociencia y las vías del dolor como el aspecto emocional). La neurociencia ha avanzado mucho, pero el cerebro es la estructura más compleja del universo conocido. No sabemos ni el 1% de él. Es inevitable que las cosas no tengan un sentido completo, ya que a menudo funciona de maneras misteriosas (aunque mirar tu mundo emocional puede ayudarte a comprender mejor las cosas más allá de la neurociencia estricta, contribuye a esa comprensión).

Sin duda, creo que forma parte del proceso (de hecho, con los síntomas y el cerebro, casi todo es posible, así que es difícil decir qué es normal y qué no en cuanto a la recuperación). Con suerte, a medida que dejes de centrarte en tu cuerpo y disminuya tu miedo, las respuestas condicionadas empezarán a desaparecer. Me refiero a que un día harás un movimiento que te provocará una crisis, pero al día siguiente harás lo mismo y será mucho menos intenso. Esto te invita a considerar otros factores, como tu mundo emocional. Puede que notes que el día que tuviste la crisis estabas muy estresado por otra cosa. No es casualidad. Esto te lleva a pensar en qué debes trabajar desde un punto de vista emocional.

Por lo que dices, me da la impresión de que sigues bastante centrado en los síntomas y en su seguimiento, pero parece que estás mejorando. ¡Adelante!

 

[Adam Coloretti (coach)]

Perhaps the only pressure is the one I place on myself to improve, and I know that can be counterproductive, so I try to regulate it. Sometimes I wonder if that is something my brain detects.

Good awareness!

Right now, I feel that my work is mainly emotional. The way to convey safety to the brain is through experience: exposing myself to what used to cause fear and showing, on an emotional level, that there is no danger. I understand that if I don’t react with fear, the brain should gradually lose the need to generate these sensations.
Please tell me if you think I am mistaken about anything; I will take your advice. The brain is complex, but it is responsive to the signals we give it, so over time it should begin to question its prediction of danger and gradually let go.

I like it - and if it isn't broken don't fix it - as long as you can see the progress then there's no reason not to ride the strategy that is giving you success

 

[Scott G]

My emotional relationship with the symptoms has improved a lot compared to a few months ago. I can’t say that my fear is 100% gone, because that wouldn’t be realistic. I think anyone who has experienced something this intense frequently would understand that.

The improved emotional relationship with your symptoms is really fantastic! Great job.

 

[Scott G]

• I was at work today speaking freely, and realize holy shit I have no pain anywhere. It was something. It didn’t last more than a few minutes, but wow lol.

Huge smile on my face. That is so cool, and so important for folks like me to hear (who are still in the early days) !