In times of doubts need a word of encouragement - just one :=)

TG957

TG957

Beloved Grand Eagle
I have CRPS/RSD in my hands (swelling, hypersensitivity, spasms in fingers, ligaments and tendons). In a way, it is "easy" to get on with your life defying pain - how else would I go about my everyday business, like cooking, showering, flossing, typing, driving etc. I gave my hands some hard work today and by noon I was in pain. I thought what I call "A Sarno thought", pain subsided but anxiety and a wave of depression came instead. I thought it was good that I was feeling sad, confused, fearful. Listening to Jon Kabat Zinn really calmed me down and let me ignore the pain.

But now swelling and spasms reached the level that is hard to ignore. I am hopeful that there will be a better day ahead, but doubts are trying to invade my brain...... I am fighting back. Will I be OK?
 
TG, It's a tough twist that when we "do" and ignore the pain, that afterwards it seems to have backlash. And, I've had the anxiety and depression aspect, as well. Even though you might not be able to write with a pen right now, ask yourself what you're feeling emotionally and don't deny it. Just feel it. Go beyond the feeling "sad." Besides your hands, what specifically in your life or past is the sadness that you try to ignore or forget?

Also, what I am attempting is to change is my use of words. Instead of saying things like "I'm going to push through, fight through the pain," I'm guarding my words to be more like: "I'm going to walk and look around," Like I noticed you said you gave your hands "hard" work. Maybe think of it more as….I used my hands in the way nature / God designed them to be used, which means they will be fine.
There's quite a few healing meditations on YouTube. I listen to Louise Hay's quite often just to keep my thoughts with hers and not mine if they are negative and she is very calming. Do you know her work?.

You will be okay, because you're already okay. You've been doing life with the pain…so now just begin to visualize life without the pain once it gives up trying to protect your emotions. I think a good cry is worthwhile too.
 
MWsunin12, thank you so much! I used to have anxiety and depression - and both went away with this new thing in my brain:=). I actually was relieved to see them come back, I would rather deal with old known "friends" than with this new one, so I was FEELING them through.

Yes, choice of words is a great idea, will try to be less combative. I will check out Louise Hay.

BTW, I really like Jon Kabat-Zinn, just bought his CD. I even play his body scan meditation from youtube as a lullaby every night.


Crying is a different story. Three visits to a therapist - still can't cry... some day....

Best of luck to you and thank you for so many words of encouragement!
 
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