Day 13 Improvement?

Last week ended up being an overall better week for me after starting off badly. I had minimal to no episodes of panic at the end of the week. The vulvodynia isn't gone, but feels improved (although I did start using a new gel on Tuesday). Perhaps 50% better? I have limited my water intake at the end of the night, which seems to help with not needing to pee at night. (I know that sounds super obvious but my throat gets so dry at night and I crave water like nothing else.)

I feel like psychotherapy is probably what is helping the most. I had a session on Thursday where I felt very uncomfortable during, but then felt so much better after that I thought I was cured. I slept 9 hours that night. Of course, the next day I was having symptoms again, but not as bad as before.

I have a social event this afternoon, which I think made it harder for me to sleep last night, but I tried not to panic and ended up sleeping 2-8am, which is not absolutely awful. I'll take it compared to some of my earlier nights.

My husband says every time I start to feel better, I get deeply disappointed if I have a setback, so I'm trying not to do that.

So here's a question:

In reading today's article in the SEP, it mentioned that a lot of people read Sarno's book and are instantly and permanently cured. That did not happen to me, and obviously it didn't happen to most people here since we're doing the SEP. In Nicole Sachs's book, she even mentioned that she was cured when she was young due to mind body work, but then when she got back pain again years later, she had to go through the entire process again, including believing in TMS.

So my question is: why are some people instantly cured when they learn about TMS, and others take weeks or months?

 

I think it’s the fact we are human and not robots.
Every mind is different, we have different experiences. Ultimately, it’s not important.
And ultimately many people with “book cures” find themselves back here again because they have not employed Sarno’s theories throughout their lives. Like Nicole, they go back to old habits and patterns.
You sound like you have a wonderfully supportive partner who is observant and will help you notice patterns in your life - others just plow headlong into things without noticing. That’s just how TMS can operate in some minds. I’m thankful everyday for the opportunity to go slow and get this stuff ingrained in my mind and to learn to notice patterns.

 

This is so easy to do! I do it. But, the truth is, we have setbacks. It’s not a perfect climb up and out. I always have to remind myself!

In @TG957 Tamara Gurin’s book, Defying the Verdict, How I Defeated Chronic Pain, she talks about this:

“As I moved through my recovery, each extinction burst was followed by a slight improvement in symptoms and then a plateau, when progress seemed to stop. A plateau could last for a month or six months. During those times, I did not see any improvement. Those were the hardest.”

I love this book, and Tamara’s story is so inspiring. I Cling to the hope that she and others offer me.

This past week has been hard for me because I’m on my fourth week of exercise, and at first, I felt better but now I feel worse. A lot of my symptoms fired back up again and it just makes me mad and frustrated. But, I figure, there’s no way out, but through. I have to keep my spirits up and not get discouraged. If I quit, I will lose for sure.

 

I checked out that book from Tamara Gurin. Very interesting stuff! After having a relatively good week where I practically thought I was cured at one point, I've been having a rough weekend, but I feel like every day I'm a little more convinced that this is TMS. The stories I've read in the last few weeks have amazed me, and I am starting to believe that the body is capable of healing itself. I still have a lot of fear and anxiety, but I'm hoping I can work through this in therapy. I guess the improvement followed by flares (extinction bursts) are to be expected, and I'm trying so hard not to let myself panic.

 

Night owl, you sound stronger all the time!

 

Diana, remember self-compassion! Don't get mad at yourself! Give yourself credit for your amazing progress to date!