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Day 9 I'm back...

G

greenAnt

Newcomer
Hi folks - I got to about Day 8 about 10 months ago, then I got much better (and also this thinking about frustrating emotional stuff was hard...), and I got distracted, then I was out of comission from an accident in the fall...

Anyway, I am looking for work in earnest for the first time in years, I am spending more time on the computer, I am also spending more time on the little laptop with bad ergonomics in order to get a break from being at the computer...
And, guess what, my arm pain is back with a vengeance. And various types of anxiety.

So - I don't want this to keep me from doing things. I want to get a job. I want to keep perspective. I don't want to be scared or confused (and not quite be aware that I'm scared or confused). I want to be relaxed and not try so hard to be a perfect person to find the perfect career...

So I'm back.

Wanting to thank all of you for being out there.
 
Hi, greenAnt. Nice name. Wonder why you chose it.
Your perfectionism may very well be the cause of your new arm pain, and the anxiety. Both are probably caused by TMS emotions... especially the perfectionism. You have to give yourself a strong dose of belief that nothing and no one is perfect. That is an impossible desire. Jesus was the only perfect person who ever lived and look what they did to him. I have had perfectionist friends and they were hell to live with, for their wives, children, and me.

I urge you to continue with the SEProgram and to read Dr. Sarno's 12 Daily Reminders that explain how to heal from TMS pain. Here is a longer version from Herbie, one of the most helpful people on this web site:


Herbie’s Extended Version of Dr. Sarno’s 12 DAILY REMINDERS

  1. The pain is due to TMS. This is real pain or anxiety but it is caused by subconscious tensions and triggers, stressors and traits to your reactions and fears and also when at boiling point your conscious tension can and does also cause real pain.
  2. The main reason for the pain is mild oxygen deprivation. This means that when you get in pain or anxiety then the blood is restricted from going to your lower back, for instance. The blood being restricted causes oxygen deprivation which causes the pain. Remember, where there is no oxygen then there is pain in the body. Also, the pain stays because of fear.
  3. TMS is a harmless condition caused by my REPRESSED EMOTIONS so even though you think you can harm yourself from the years of pain you have felt and how you feel in general -- so far no reports have been heard from TMS healing knowledge causing damage to anyone, it only helps.
  4. The principle emotion is your repressed ANGER -- this means under your consciousness lies something that happens automatically to everyone. TMSers have repressions that are stored because of our personality traits, traumas, stressors, fears, strain, etc... When these stored repressions build and build, then eventually they cause the brain to send pain into your body to keep you from having an emotional crises. The mind-body thinks it is helping you.
  5. TMS exists to DISTRACT your attentions from the emotions, stressors, tensions and strains of your personality traits because if you can get distraction then you won’t have to be in emotional turmoil. When you don't face and feel your emotions and they get repressed because you didn't want to deal with something -- they are just adding up in this beaker, ready to pour over and create real pain and anxiety in your body.
  6. Since my body is perfectly normal, there is nothing to fear. So in reality when I fear the pain or anxiety I just cause myself undo strain and tension adding to the beaker of pain. If I fear, then I feed the pain, If I fear, it’s impossible to recondition. Fear keeps the pain and anxiety alive in the body through focus.
  7. Therefore, physical activity is harmless. If I want to work against the pain I could but it’s better to lose some of the pain so when I start my life over I have to be in pain trying to heal because facing the repressions and all the other activities that cause the pain and reversing my fear and focus to them, then I can heal.
  8. I am resuming all normal physical activity. I don't fear moving anymore. I believe in my body’s ability to heal now. I can move as I want. I will not fear moving with a bent back anymore. I will also practice going out and acting normal again, not in fear of what pain might do to me.
  9. The pain is unimportant and powerless. Its only power is how it is hidden -- its illusion, its fear.
  10. I will keep my attention on the emotional issues. I will think about my emotions and feel my emotions throughout the day. I will not judge, criticize or fear my emotions. I will not run from my emotional issues but face every one of them. I will feel my emotions fully and cry if I need to. Then I will release the emotion and get my mind and thoughts back to my life and living in the present.
  11. I am in control of all of this. This is how I recover.
  12. I will be thinking PSYCHOLOGICALLY AT ALL TIMES. This means I will keep my thoughts on psychological issues like happiness, fear and anger -- traits and triggers, conditioning and journaling -- The science behind mind-body/TMS healing, etc.... This way I will not feed my thoughts to the body -- that is a trick of TMS. TMS will always try to get me to focus on the body caused by the pain until I break its show and flair. When I get my attention off physical symptoms and on to emotional issues and psychological issues then I will not feed the fear of the physical issues anymore, thus making the TMS of no pain effect on the body. This will in return, give us the cure and become pain-free.
 
Thank You! This is very useful. The oxygen deprivation point is interesting - I certainly also breathe much more shallowly or stop, when I am tense or very focused.

Regarding the name - I first chose "redAnt" and then the warning color of it made me think of stress and I decided on a more healing green...
 
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