I ran a marathon last week

[JTaylor]

I haven’t been on this forum for months. In fact, I haven’t really thought much about TMS over the last few months. I still experience pain everyday. It mainly only affects the middle finger of my right hand now and this is 30-50% better than it was, depending on the day. My shoulder and wrist pain is pretty much gone now. All I can say is that I stopped thinking about it. At one point, I was journaling, reading TMS books and listening to experts everyday, but I found this didn’t help my pain. It only started to get better when I ignored it (easier said than done!)

I have been running on and off for about 6 years now. I ran my first 10k race in October last year and my first half marathon at the end of the year. This year I’ve ran 3 more 10k races, 3 half marathons and just ran my first marathon last weekend. I told myself I couldn’t do it so many times. I experienced set backs during my training, such as pain in my leg muscles (which I realised was caused by TMS). I was also dealing with so much in my personal life and felt like giving up so many times. When I crossed the finish line last week I felt like crying. It was such an overwhelming feeling. It was mentally and physically exhausting but I didn’t give up.

I did something I never thought I was capable of and now I know I am capable of doing so much more than I ever thought. Although I’m not fully recovered, I am hopeful there will be a day that I can wake up without pain. I’m signed up for my next marathon next April and hope to do more 10k’s and half marathons in between.

I just wanted to share this here in the hope that somebody might see it and it might motivate them to keep working on their goals, because we can all do far more than we think we can.

 

[JanAtheCPA]

Thanks for posting your story, @JTaylor - we always love to hear about successes!

It only started to get better when I ignored it (easier said than done!)

The concept of "just ignoring your pain" is a hard one for folks to grasp, and yes, it certainly is easier said than done. When I read this sentence, I immediately went back to the sentence that preceded it, which is "At one point, I was journaling, reading TMS books and listening to experts everyday...". To me, this indicates that you were doing the work - and although TMS knowledge alone is very powerful, for most of us, the only thing that will actually start making significant and lasting changes in the way our brains are wired, and to change the way in which our brains automatically respond to a symptom, is to DO THE WORK.

In other words, and I feel very strongly about this: significant exposure to the concepts, and making a commitment to techniques which help us understand, often for the first time in our lives, how to access and accept the negative repressed emotions that live in our unconscious brains, is a brain-changer and a game-changer.

The key to what I'm talking about is that negative inner dialogue - the constant warnings in our primitive lizard brains, maintaining a level of fear and anxiety so we stay safe in the dangerous primitive world. The key to recovery from chronic pain is to change that dialogue so that we live in a state of acceptance and mindfulness of the present.

"Ignoring" your pain does not occur in a vacuum. Our brains are ALWAYS talking to us. The key is how we respond.

Back to your experience - I totally get that it was a significant step in your recovery to give yourself permission to let go of "the work" and just go live your life, and I think this is really important for us to keep in mind! (in other words, doing the work can itself become an obssession and thus a distraction, which will slow down or impede recovery).

But now I'm playing devil's advocate when I ask: is it possible that in letting go of the work, your response to your brain's negative inner dialogue, and its ongoing attempts to keep you fearful with symptoms, had in fact completely turned around, thanks to your immersion and practice in the work?

Another way to put this is that "ignoring" actually means that you now simply - and perhaps automatically - respond to your fearful brain with compassion, acceptance, and a rejection of fear. I've always believed that this is the ultimate goal. And, easier said than done .

~Jan