I feel hopeless...

Hi everyone, my name is Diego and I’m from Barcelona. I wanted to share my story because I’m once again feeling a bit hopeless…



Almost 4 years ago, after going through a couple of very stressful years, I started to develop strange symptoms that scared me a lot. Some of them are:

• Dry mouth
  
  
• Discomfort on the tongue
  
  
• Tinnitus
  
  
• Muscle twitches
  
  
• Burning sensations in my limbs
  
  
• Raynaud’s syndrome
  
  
• Insomnia
  
  
• Jaw pain
  

…and probably more that I can’t even remember right now.



But since then, the main symptom I haven’t been able to get rid of is dry eyes, which comes along with a very uncomfortable pressure behind my eyes. It gets worse especially when looking at screens or while driving, but honestly, I usually feel it throughout the day even without screens. This symptom has come and gone over time, but what really troubles me is the fear every time it returns—that this time it might stay for good or get worse.



Deep down I try to believe it could be a TMS-related symptom, but whenever it comes back, fear and doubt show up as well. I actually had a few calmer days recently despite the discomfort, but yesterday I stumbled upon a Reddit group where many people described having eye problems similar to mine due to certain OLED screens. They were all searching for different devices without this technology. Reading that really unsettled me and made me question again if my problem is truly TMS or something else like what they say.



What I try to do is look for inconsistencies in my symptoms, since I do have good periods and bad periods, good days and not-so-good days, even though I’m doing exactly the same things.



Can you help me? What do you think?

 

Sounds like classic TMS - lots of symptoms straight after a stressful couple of years. Textbook. Also, the fact that the dry eyes changes day-to-day activity to activity is good evidence for TMS.

How much TMS reading and even more importantly practices have you done? This is essential to know where to direct you and how to help.

Also, have you done work to process the emotional load from the stressful time? TMS is a rage-driven beast and most of us need to learn how to express our emotions fully.

Reddit is notorious for being an anxiety and depressive driven space for pain - they always look for something physical and tend to whip out an AK-47 and shoot down anyone brave enough to post about TMS. So I wouldn't be taking their advice and recommendations too seriously. I really recommend to stop looking at those kind of forums especially as they are scaring you.

The fact that the dry eyes has fully gone before is fantastic - I understand that there is fear associated with it coming back which is normal but this strongly suggests you don't have a physical problem with your eyes.

It sounds like it is time to work with your fear -> meditate, look at your thought patterns, gather evidence (you are doing this), journal, do stuff that relaxes you e.g. listen to music, take a bath, yoga and be consistent with reminding yourself that you have TMS and that TMS is not dangerous and not doing you harm. Hurt doesn't equal harm.

All this being said, I can tell you are having a hard time right now which I totally understand.

However, the help needs to happen from within now as recovering from TMS is an inside job which you are absolutely capable of.

 

I'm assuming you have already been to the dr and nothing was found regarding any of these symptoms. I'd highly recommend starting the SEP program on this website. It's free and helps you work on your emotions through journaling prompts. You will also need to calm down your fear of your dry eyes. Easy to say-not easy to do. Looking for inconsistencies is a good way to help tell yourself this is TMS. Make sure you write it down as well so you can go back to this list and remind yourself.

Stay off Reddit. It's a dumpster fire of people are in chronic pain and feel hopeless. Delete the app and don't look back.

This forum is encouraging and helpful when you need it!

 

I’ve read the books by Sarno and Schubiner, and Dan Buglio’s videos help me a lot, but no matter how much theory I know, I can’t seem to get rid of this symptom. Over time, I’ve noticed many inconsistencies with it, but it always ends up coming back and still leaves me in doubt. It makes me really sad, because I’d love to help people going through this, but then I tell myself, “How are you going to help if you can’t even overcome it yourself?”

 

Yes, I’ve been to the doctor and they didn’t find anything other than some simple suggestions. They did find dry eye, but they never told me it was anything serious. All the other symptoms I mentioned have disappeared. The only one left is the dry eye, which has me feeling really down…