Answer
Great question. There's s a recent email exchange I had with a TMS sufferer that gets to the heart of this. She's given me permission to repost it. Her initial question and subsequent response addresses the true power of nonresistance.
Jennifer:
Hello, I just read your article about TMS/PPD and the fear and attention cycle. I have also recently read Dr. Sarno's book and am convinced that the dizziness I have experienced for months when I close my eyes and try to sleep is psychological, after much medical testing. I've had a horrible year, the most emotional one of my life. The problem is that the dizziness affects my sleep, it tries to tell me I can't sleep. I am trying to not be afraid of it and not think about it, but I don't know how to NOT think about it when I'm feeling it so intensely! I desperately want to break the cycle because I truly believe now I am dealing with a conditioned response: lie down in bed, close eyes, get dizzy. Wake up in the night, immediately feel it, fight to get back to sleep, feel defeated. I lie there and try to tell it to stop, to tell my brain I don't care, to think about something else, it just won't go away. I'm in counseling, working through and praying through my emotions, but now all my emotions are centering around this problem. Does this sound like something that TMS could do to someone? Do you have any advice that can help me?
Me:
Hi J,
This is totally TMS. The dizziness is just a physical manifestation of anxiety. First of all, don't try so hard to get rid of the dizziness and don't try so hard not to pay attention to it. You're working way, way too hard. Let's just have you focus on your breath for awhile. When you lie down, just focus on the breath come in and out, and feel the physical sensation of your breath coming in and out of your stomach.
Accepting the dizziness is the first step, as counterintuitive as that may sound. Just focus on the breath, let it feel good coming in and out, and just accept what is. The harder we struggle to get rid of a symptom, the more power we give it.
Good luck, and remember, you don't have to eliminate the symptom, you just have to make peace with it. It will eventually fade.
Jennifer:
Alan,
Thank you so much for your response. I am so glad I read your e-mail before bed last night. For the first time in months, I just let the dizziness come in without caring about it. It was almost liberating. By doing that, I was feeling the whirling it SO strongly, it was all over me even more than when I try to control it. But I didn't try to create a "force field" or squeeze my brain down in a hundred different ways to combat it, or get upset or frustrated. I just accepted it (yes, VERY counterintuitive because I hate it so much) and relaxed into it. And after having its tantrum for a while, I am almost certain it settled down somewhat before I drifted to sleep. That has never happened.
Before, I would (sort of? maybe?) succeed in fighting it off in certain ways, holding it off by my own will, but then in the place between waking and sleep it would spin violently before I drifted off. I tell you, that's no way to fall asleep - working so hard to stop something tormenting your brain!
I believe that freedom from this is possible and that these breakthroughs will continue to happen. I do not expect it all to stop overnight. But I can SO understand that all of my fighting and working to succeed, to control it, to FIX it myself has probably been my enemy all along. This is a major paradigm shift in my life.
Thank you again for taking the time to respond!
Any advice or information provided here does not and is not intended to be and should not be taken to constitute specific professional or psychological advice given to any group or individual. This general advice is provided with the guidance that any person who believes that they may be suffering from any medical, psychological, or mindbody condition should seek professional advice from a qualified, registered/licensed physician and/or psychotherapist who has the opportunity to meet with the patient, take a history, possibly examine the patient, review medical and/or mental health records, and provide specific advice and/or treatment based on their experience diagnosing and treating that condition or range of conditions. No general advice provided here should be taken to replace or in any way contradict advice provided by a qualified, registered/licensed physician and/or psychotherapist who has the opportunity to meet with the patient, take a history, possibly examine the patient, review medical and/or mental health records, and provide specific advice and/or treatment based on their experience diagnosing and treating that condition or range of conditions.
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because.. That is what it's all about! Thank you.. For everything!