Write a short post about the level of acceptance you have of the TMS diagnosis, and of any doubts or worries you may have at this point.
My wife used the "structured education program" to help her with some chronic pain issues. My problem is not physical pain, it is anxiety, and more specifically social anxiety.
I have very little doubt that this program can help. I have a small amount of trepidation when it comes to applying the concepts to anxiety instead of direct physical pain, but I think the program can be helpful for someone like me. I figure the anxiety issues will possibly turn into physical pain if not dealt with. And I see value in the process. I believe that the end product, whether it's pain in the body or anxiety in the mind, can be addressed by following this education program.
And I want the anxiety issues GONE. I'm tired of them being a limiting factor in my life. I'm tired of my fears controlling my actions and limiting my choices and chances for happiness.
On the other hand, this is not my first rodeo. I've spent thousands on therapy over the years. I've tried at least a dozen psychotropic medications. So I have concerns about this program. What I hope has changed this time is my commitment level. I think the therapy in years past failed to have a lasting impact because I wasn't willing to dig in and do the work. I'm sure I'm not alone here in having a LOT of deep-seated trauma from bullying I received as a child. I can intellectually recognize that I am not that scared little boy anymore, but bringing up those old feelings and working through them still scares the crap out of me.
The one thing I can say for sure is that the concept of living the rest of my life with these fears and allowing them to control me is now even scarier than the concept of bringing all this crap up and finally dealing with it. So hopefully that thought will help me work through this.
