What a great question.
First of all, I want to clarify that it is not the emotions that are causing your pain. Rather, it is your body's response to the emotions in the form of tension and anxiety. You mentioned that people upset you which leads to pain and this is something which you fear. The fear is the primary reinforcer of the pain so interrupting this pattern of reinforcement should be your primary goal.
Yout primitive brain is interpreting danger when you experience certain emotions like anger and/or sadness. When you experience this, first create safety for yourself by breathing and sending a message to your brain that you are safe and not in danger.
Once you have this bit down, then you can absolutely practice feeling your emotions, ideally in your body. Regulate your anxiety and then focus on how anger/sadness feels in your body. What's the sensation? Can you just focus on how it feels and allow yourself to feel it?
If you need to remove yourself from a situation to practice one or both of these exercises, do so by all means. After all, what is more important than feeling safe and caring for yourself?
This takes a lot of practice so don't get discouraged when it doesn't work. Just remind yourself that you're learning how to care for yourself in a new way and that this takes time and patience.
Best of luck!
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