Last year I was a normal 25 year old guy. I had (and still have) a beautiful girlfriend, had recently finished college, and was working towards a career change from the laborious job i was in into tech.
That all changed in April of 2021. I developed HPV 4 years into a monogamous relationship which ruined my mental health. My partner was tested and was negative for HPV, and I knew that I had never been unfaithful to her but my brain could not believe it. I had doctors tell me HPV can surface years and years after exposure, but I couldn't believe it. For 2 months I racked my brain to see if I was repressing a memory of cheating on my partner. I called my friends to make sure they didn't know about anything nefarious that I had done. All of them reassured me that I definitely did not cheat. Even my girlfriend reassured me that my memories were correct, and stuck by my side through all of it. It was horrible.
A few months later I was feeling better, but decided maybe my immune system was weak and that is why the warts appeared. I went to my PCP and she did some blood work. It came back that I had high bilirubin. This sent me into an absolute spiral. I compulsively googled about bilirubin and learned that it is a liver enzyme. This lead me to believe that I did in fact cheat and forgot and had contracted hepatitis (even though i am vaccinated against B and A). I spiraled mentally because of this.
In June I was feeling better but still doing some compulsive googling. That is when shit his the fan. I was picking something out and my back went out. I couldn't really bend over for a couple of days, but by Monday I was back at work doing a laborious job. I felt fine until it hapend again. I also start to get a chronic sore throat that seems to come and go.
My girlfriend and I were headed back from a camping trip and I was sitting with bad posture for a couple of hours reading a book. When we got home and I got out of the car I had the same feeling in my back except it didn't go away this time. For the rest of June and all of July i was in pain every day. I quit my job on August 1st to learn programming and do PT full time, and my back actually felt a lot better. I also start to take the sore throat which was diagnosed as LPR more seriously and got on PPIS. My throat is killing me at this point
September comes and I get another flare up. It puts me out for a month. By October my back is feeling a-lot better and so is my throat. I am able to eat whatever I want and am able to workout again pain free. I went home for thanksgiving and had a great time.
Now I am dealing with the latest back pain flare up that hapend right before Christmas, and ruined my entire trip home.
I really need help. I am only 25 and my life feels like it is ruined. I am really hoping it is TMS since all of this came about under a huge amount of stress.
That all changed in April of 2021. I developed HPV 4 years into a monogamous relationship which ruined my mental health. My partner was tested and was negative for HPV, and I knew that I had never been unfaithful to her but my brain could not believe it. I had doctors tell me HPV can surface years and years after exposure, but I couldn't believe it. For 2 months I racked my brain to see if I was repressing a memory of cheating on my partner. I called my friends to make sure they didn't know about anything nefarious that I had done. All of them reassured me that I definitely did not cheat. Even my girlfriend reassured me that my memories were correct, and stuck by my side through all of it. It was horrible.
A few months later I was feeling better, but decided maybe my immune system was weak and that is why the warts appeared. I went to my PCP and she did some blood work. It came back that I had high bilirubin. This sent me into an absolute spiral. I compulsively googled about bilirubin and learned that it is a liver enzyme. This lead me to believe that I did in fact cheat and forgot and had contracted hepatitis (even though i am vaccinated against B and A). I spiraled mentally because of this.
In June I was feeling better but still doing some compulsive googling. That is when shit his the fan. I was picking something out and my back went out. I couldn't really bend over for a couple of days, but by Monday I was back at work doing a laborious job. I felt fine until it hapend again. I also start to get a chronic sore throat that seems to come and go.
My girlfriend and I were headed back from a camping trip and I was sitting with bad posture for a couple of hours reading a book. When we got home and I got out of the car I had the same feeling in my back except it didn't go away this time. For the rest of June and all of July i was in pain every day. I quit my job on August 1st to learn programming and do PT full time, and my back actually felt a lot better. I also start to take the sore throat which was diagnosed as LPR more seriously and got on PPIS. My throat is killing me at this point
September comes and I get another flare up. It puts me out for a month. By October my back is feeling a-lot better and so is my throat. I am able to eat whatever I want and am able to workout again pain free. I went home for thanksgiving and had a great time.
Now I am dealing with the latest back pain flare up that hapend right before Christmas, and ruined my entire trip home.
I really need help. I am only 25 and my life feels like it is ruined. I am really hoping it is TMS since all of this came about under a huge amount of stress.
