Day 12 Blowback pain is no fun

Three big things happened yesterday:

- I drove a car that "hurts my eyes" (and so I don't drive) 40 minutes each way to Winchester instead of sitting at home googling symptoms.
- I wore reading glasses even though I'm "not sure whether they help or hurt my eyes"
- Fire dept came to check on an electrical burning smell (all is well) and I was triggered and I called my aunt and talked out my emotions instead of bottling them up

TMS rewarded me with an extremely painful night in my body all over. I managed well for several nearly sleepless hours but as usual, by about 5:30 I lost my perspective and was thinking "do I need a new glasses prescription, should I go on some sort of medication, what a I doing wrong."

Problem-solving.

Oh how I wish there were something I could *do* to relieve my pain and improve my sleep. My perfectionist self (thanks, today's SEP) wants to do it right so that I will be safe. Perhaps I need to take less action to address TMS and more action to just live my life. TMS doesn't like that, though.

 

This is the truth! And it’s correct. I always think of @Steve Ozanich recovery story. It’s recorded in his book, The Great Pain Deception (so worth reading!)I have never heard of so much pain and determination as he went through. He refused to stop living. He challenged his TMS. Defied it. He was blasted with pain. He walked through it and didn’t give up. He finally got rid of his TMS. The main lesson for me: it’s not for free. TMS healing is hard. And you can’t give up.

Here’s a search on his posts. You might find something interesting.
https://www.tmswiki.org/forum/search/8220873/?q=Steven+ozanich&o=date&c%5Bnode%5D=16 (Search Results for Query: Steven ozanich | TMS Forum (The Mindbody Syndrome))

 

“- I drove a car that "hurts my eyes" (and so I don't drive) 40 minutes each way to Winchester instead of sitting at home googling symptoms.
- I wore reading glasses even though I'm "not sure whether they help or hurt my eyes"

WIN!!!!!

Frankly having an electrical smell will send anyone into a bit of a stress mode. So give yourself some grace!

You really did well, and it’s often times of doing well and stepping out of the TMS comfort zone that symptoms will flair as your brain tries to corral you back into the corner of “safety”. Be kind to yourself, give yourself a million internal high fives for doing it!

 

Thank you! I'm working on it!

Thanks for the tip, @Diana-M -- I just read some of his posts.