Any advice appreciated!

Hi, I have just joined this forum and any help or advice would be gratefully received.
I read Dr Sarnos book Healiny Back Pain 3 years ago after suffering from years of back pain(s) culminating in a spasm which absolutely floored me. I slowly recovered to a degree, and then I read Dr Sarnos which I got straight away and completely recovered to a point where I've been pain free until a couple of months ago.
This is lower back pain which is really bad when I'm stood, and it's getting worse.
I understand the concepts in Dr Sarnos book and I'm trying to work them now but to no avail!
I've had a lot happen in my life during the last year. The break up of my marriage, a complete change round in work to be able to accommodate my Son who is 5 nearly 6 and money is fairly tight but I have enough. Things are levelling out now and I realise that all this emotional turmoil has caused my back pain but I can't seem to shift it! It's been nearly 3 months now and is is getting me down. I'm still working and I started jogging a few weeks ago (always wanted to do it and as the book says 'don't let the pain stop you doing physical activity') the pain was there when I began running and ironically I doesn't hurt when I run!

I talk to my brain and think emotionally and not physically.

I've just ordered Steve Ozanichs book The Great Pain Deception after reading reviews.

I don't know what else to do.

Any advice will be greatly appreciated!

Thank you

Adam

 

Sounds like you are doing a lot of good things and have the right attitude regarding TMS in terms of it being emotionally based. I don't have anything else to add other than I always have to remember to forget about the outcome and just do the work. Sort of like in the movie, "Field of Dreams" - just build it and they will come.

 

Thanks Kevin! sorry for the late reply. I really appreciate your advice and you're right! I have been reading Steve Ozanich's book and the pain is ebbing. It moved into my neck briefly, however that has gone and my lower back is around 70% better and impoving all the time!

Thank you once again!

 

Trying to heal means you're still obsessing over the symptoms in some capacity. Obsession and trying to heal encourages symptoms and stimulates the nervous system. You have to stop actively trying to heal.

As Kevin wisely pointed out, this means forgetting about the desired outcome (to heal) - and getting back to fully living your life without fear. What do you enjoy doing? What do you love about yourself? Do you connect with life and yourself through meditation, going for walks, loving others, listening to uplifting music, appreciating nature, etc.? These are simply ideas, not things you have to do. Find something that speaks to you personally and love the hell out of it.

Understand that nothing is permanent in life, and you and your body are safe right now. None of this is permanent. You don’t even have to dwell on what caused the symptoms (this can sometimes lead to more obsession) - you only have to work toward acceptance, loving yourself, and enjoying some things in life. But do these things because love is good for your soul, not because you want to heal.

For what it’s worth, sometimes ordering more TMS books or further researching this topic also creates more obsession. Information overload is not necessarily your friend. Believe in your ability to heal and look to people who have healed for guidance.

There’s nothing wrong with not being healed yet, and relapses or bad days can certainly happen as we deal with difficult situations and powerful emotions throughout our lives (none of us are perfect with flawless lives), but be mindful of advice from anyone who is obsessed with and fearful of their own symptoms. It’s like taking financial advice from someone still working their way out of bankruptcy; they can and will absolutely come back stronger than ever and eliminate fear and obsession one day, but they aren’t there today. And that’s 100% OK because we’ve all been there - otherwise we wouldn’t be on this forum at all. I wish I had known that while I was still healing and feeling terrified because I was primarily interacting with people who were in just as bad of a place as me. It made me think healing wasn’t possible. Many of us have healed!

As I always say, TMS is not an actual medical condition. Nobody “has” TMS. It’s a natural bodily response to emotions - every single individual who has been on this planet experiences it. The body is designed to respond to our emotions - it’s the mind-body connection: this is why wounds have been scientifically documented to heal slower when one is stressed, this is the placebo effect, this is how spontaneous recoveries/remissions from serious issues occur (fun fact: the recoveries/remissions aren’t so spontaneous after all!), this is fight-or-flight mode turning on during a threat, this is the release of happy neurotransmitters when you smile, this is the release of adrenaline while upset, this is why cancer patients die quicker when they’re depressed and believe they’re going to die, etc. From a simple eye twitch when you’re angry to full blown CRPS or PTSD after a traumatic event, we’re all affected. Don’t view this as anything other than a fact of nature. Your mind and your body are powerful, and you can overcome this. Your symptoms will decrease as you truly get back to living.

 

You say you don't know what else to do. But the point is that there is nothing else for you to do. You have read the books and you already know that the pain is initiated by psychological processes. That's all that you need to know. There is no more work to do. What's left is to let go. To let go, you need to shift your attitude towards the pain and that shift cannot be achieved by thinking about pain, worrying about pain, making an effort to get rid of pain, etc. This shift can only be achieved by letting go. Trust yourself. You will heal. Let go.

 

Also, if you were to talk to Steve Ozanich, he would say the same to you about not trying to heal and just living a positive life. He's one of the inspirations who helped me understand this. Let me quote him directly: