Day 36 A Short Break for Grief

Hi, I'm about to start the last week of SEP after a few days break. On Sunday, I tried to rescue a sick crow but he sadly didn't make it. This has hit me hard because I have actually befriended my local crows and I feel very connected to nature/wildlife. For me, this has been like losing a friend that I love and care for.

On top of that, the vet hospital I took the crow to was the same place my rabbit passed away at the end of 2023. And last week was the three year anniversary of when my other rabbit passed away. So, it has felt like this triple whammy of grief and I just allowed myself to be with that and feel every emotion I needed to. Which I guess is the whole point of this!

After my second rabbit passed away in November 2023, my chronic calf pain became very extreme and what I thought was permanent. Before, I had bad flare-ups on/off throughout the years with mild pain running in the background otherwise which worsened when I walked. Grief and the suppression of my grief has certainly played a huge role in my chronic pain, going back to my teenage years as well when I lost a friend to suicide and my great grandad in the space of 10 months, so it felt important to me that I took this time out to be with that feeling.

I feel ready and excited now to take on this last week. I do still have a lot of pain and it's moved around quite a bit, but I've noticed a big decrease in it, especially in my legs. These new symptoms scared me at first but now I just roll with it, and I'm finding it much easier to think psychologically. My confidence has grown with walking, ditching the crutches the majority of the time, and I've also got rid of the huge stack of pillows I used to prop my legs up in bed. Even though I still have pain for now, I know that this is fantastic progress and that I am truly healing.

Last week, here we go!

 

Good for you! And it’s working!

 

Thank you so much, that's very kind of you to say and I appreciate it

 

Thank you and yes it is!